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and reversing brain damage. Why is it that doctors here can't do it? I The sound of her pout brought a sad smile to Sabrina's face. ' this is reality, Morn.' Her smile fisted wanly.
"Maybe you could give the doctors a little hint ... you know, a shove in the right direction?, ' can't do that. My books are copyrighted., 78
.0--ft was the standard answer Amanda gave when rina teased. The fact was, Amanda had imbued the ""Dusalonians with their extraordinary medical powers, "only after Nicky was bom. if J.B. Monroe hid behind
"","his horror stories, Amanda Monroe expressed her .1 *
...,..@wishes through science fiction. ' besides/ Amanda went on, Tarth doctors are KI, too full of themselves. They'd never listen to an alien. When I dared suggest to the young doctor who fives next door that he. should have his wife drink my ambrosia each night, he looked at me like I was crazy. That, after asking me why I look forty when I'm about to turn fifty-six. You are coming out for my party, aren't you, Sabrina?' ', Mom, I don't know.' Vhy not? it's not every day that I have a birthday. You didn't come for Thanksgiving or Christmas. I haven't seen you since last summer, and only then when I flew into New York, for my publisher's party.' How could Sabrina explain the pain she felt seeing her family, when she didn't wholly understand it herself ?
... No, not seeing her family. Having her family see Nicky. She wasn't ashamed of him, at least she didn't think she was. But she'd wanted to do motherhood right, and Nicky hidn't worked. She loved him. She loved her parents. She watched them watching him, and she felt odd self-conscious and guilty, maybe disappointed. And she had trouble being with J.B. He would stare at Nicky, then declare that the problem was a spirit that had entered through a hair follicle and had taken control of the child - or something else equally bizarre. And she had trouble Page 27
Barbara Delinsky - Commitments
seeing J.B. Is daughters, who were seven and ten, adorable, outgoing, and quick. They had all their marbles. Her son didn't, and it hurt. 79
Iit occurred to her to wonder whether she was competing with her brother, which puzzled her, because she didn't know why she should. But she had too many things to think about, so she simply said in, response to her mother's question, ' with Nicky is such a hassle.' '
we want to see him. We want to see you.' ''s been very busy. I doubt he could take the time.' Tine/was Amanda's reaction. ' him home." Sabrina gave a dry chuckle. ' love lost there. ''ve always found Nicholas to be a little stiff for my tastes. And that was even before Nicky was bom. Is he still being difficult?' ''s okay.' ' he accepting Nicky any more than he did?' ' still denies the problem, if that's what you mean.' ' he spend time with him?' ' in a while. He tosses him in the air, roughhouses a little - anything to give a semblance of normalcy. I hold my breath when Nicky's head wobbles, but the worst of it is that Nicholas always manages to get a sound out of him. The sound may be Nicky's version of a terrified scream - we'll never know, but it is a sound2 ' Nicholas at all supportive of you?" Sabrina bowed her head and rubbed the frown lines between her eyes. Her mother wasn't in outer space now; she was right there, all there, summarizing the worst of the'situation in a nutshell. ' thinks I'm an alarmist.' ' of what he thinks of you, he has to have some respect for the doctors, doesn't he? I It had been months since Nicholas had gone with 80 to any of the appointments. ' hangs on to his S., ' like he needs a counselor himself.' Sabrina wanted to laugh. Nicholas saw himself as in total control of his life. He wouldn't admit t Nicky had problems. He'd never admit that he d problems himself
. She could just imagine his icule if she dared to suggest marital counseling. She wanted marital counseling. She wanted something. She wanted to spill everything, to tell her ,,'@"mother about the wreck that was
Learning to Kill: Stories