Free Releasing the Wolf by Dianna Hardy Page B

accepted his own death in seven years time anyway, because he didn’t want a mate.
    “Did it occur to you that showering is the first thing a human woman might do on arriving home after sex with a stranger?”
    Damn it! Taylor exhaled in frustration. It hadn’t even entered his mind. Maybe you’re more wolf than you think.
    “Don’t worry about it now. Unless her change is due imminently, your ejaculant will be enough to ease her. Let’s focus on Ryan.”
    He tried not to cringe. The way Lawrence talked about sex was so … biological . But then he’d been brought up a werewolf – he’d been born a werewolf. Werewolves weren’t human; not completely, anyway. Unless you were like Taylor: turned. He was the only member of the pack that had had a previous life. He had been human … he had had a wife…
    He forced himself away from those thoughts and watched Lawrence insert six darts into his bespoke weapon – darts containing the only thing that could kill Tridents: nectar from the night-blooming Datura plant. Of course, the fuckers were immune to silver.
    Taylor studied the man. “Are you sure you want to come with us?”
    His shoulders stiffened. “Getting Ryan out of there is what matters. I won’t shift – I can control it. I’ve spent years controlling it.”
    “If something happens to you—”
    “If something happens to me, the pack is yours. If something happens to Ryan, the pack is yours.”
    He felt the blood drain from his face. “I’m really not Alpha material. I’ve only been a wolf for eight months.”
    “Being a leader has nothing to do with how long you’ve been a wolf, and it doesn’t have to be about brute strength, you know that. You’ve earnt the pack’s respect over the past few weeks. You have the skills of strategy, and mediation. They already listen to you. You would do a good job.”
    “I … I haven’t made my peace with being a wolf yet.”
    Lawrence pinned him with this pale blue eyes. “That’s bloody obvious. But sometimes you have to throw yourself in the deep end before you can know what you’re capable of.
    “Right then…” He snapped the barrel in place and slotted the gun into the fitted clips on his trousers, along with two hunting knives. “It’s almost one o’clock.”
    They headed out of the study and down the huge staircase, but before he opened the door, Lawrence turned and stared at him with the most warmth he’d ever seen on the guy. “You did good tonight, Taylor. With Lydia. You did good.”
    He just about succeeded in pushing down the lump in his throat.
    Yeah, very Alpha of you, Taylor – go ahead and bawl your eyes out.
    He nodded his thanks, Lawrence opened the door, and they both stepped into the rain to meet the pack.
     
    ~*~
     
    It was the scream that woke her, and it took her a good few seconds to realise the scream was coming from her own lungs, and even longer to understand that she was no longer dreaming. Because she could see his face.
    She remembered his face.
    Oh, god, I remember his face!
    Her eyes brimmed with tears, and she didn’t know if they were of relief, joy or agony. That cold, stabbing pain in her heart was back, just as strongly as before.
    She wailed and doubled over, clutching at and rubbing her chest – anything to ease it. Her vision was blurry; her head pounded with something that felt close to a migraine, the pelting of the rain against the window only marginally louder.
    I can’t do this, I can’t do this, oh fuck I can’t do this!
    She risked a glance down at her chest, fully expecting to see a gaping hole where her heart should be, or some knife sticking out of it – it wouldn’t at all have surprised her to discover that maybe she’d stabbed herself in her sleep. This pain was too real – no way was this imagined. Of course, there was nothing there but smooth skin.
    She blinked, trying to clear her vision. Lights flashed in front of her eyes every time she did so. All these years she thought