my work schedule.”
“Where do you work?”
“At TGIF, on Rockville Pike.”
“Really! I go in there all the time. Why haven’t I seen you there before?”
“I just started recently.”
Mr. Billingsley’s voice summoned Jeremy again.
“Master Jeremy, your new guest is waiting.”
“I’ve got to go, Eve.”
Jeremy kissed my cheek and I closed my eyes.
“I can’t wait to see you again…” he whispered in my ear.
When I opened my eyes, he was gone.
In conclusion, all I can think to say is this. Thank you, Jeremy. You’ve made my first sexual experience overwhelmingly beautiful. I’ll remember it for the rest of my life. You’ve changed everything, like a meteorite soaring down from the Heavens, shooting through the sky in a streak of smoke and bursting my life into flames. Into brilliant, beautiful, all-consuming flames. I came to your Harem to save you, but you ended up saving me.
My Lord and Master…
Ok girls, I’m back and here’s the dish. I arrived at the Rockville Harem Friday night, a few minutes before 9 and rang the doorbell. This odd-looking butler guy, who introduced himself as Billingsley, ushered me through the foyer, down a paneled corridor and into a vast impressive library. I noticed all the classics of English literature that I loved, bound in expensive hardback covers. How lovely. An American man who likes to read! I thought they’d gone extinct a long time ago. There must be at least one left in the world. I love you already Jeremy, so much my heart is about to break.
I sat down on a leather sofa and the weird old servant handed me some kind of contract. I scanned it quickly, signed it and put it aside. The guy took it away and left the room briefly. Hey, Jeremy, you reeled in a live, if fat one! Billingsley came back in a minute later and handed me a copy of the contract. I left it on the side table. The butler dude left, telling me Jeremy will be with me shortly.
As I was waiting, the doorbell rang and this mousy, conservatively dressed woman entered the library with Billingsley. What in the world was she doing here? She smiled at me, like she was the official greeter of all the new PTA members. If she’s my only competition vying for the affection of Jeremy, I’m not too worried. I may be overweight, but that slender stick of a girl looked like she’d be a cold fish in bed. Her blonde hair was all tied up in a bun on top of her head like a spinster.
The mousy girl smiled at me. I felt bad for being so catty so I smiled back at her. Oh crap. Actually she had a pretty face and a well-endowed attractive body. And she was skinny, the goddamn little bitch! She was pretty too, but with her lost look and trembling hands she looked like she just wandered out of the door of a mental asylum. Still, with this kind of competition, I better put out with Jeremy tonight. When was my last period?
Out of the corner of my eye, I watched the weird mousy girl staring at her contract and reading it over and over, holding the pen, but not signing it. She seemed to be caught up in some moral dilemma, a great spiritual conflict.
Listen, sister, it all boils down to this. There are just two choices, option A or option B. Option A: I want the hunky guy to knock my lights out. Option B: I don’t want the hunky guy to knock my lights out. If you pick option A, sign on the dotted line. If you choose Option B, there’s the door, adios. At the Rockville Harem, it’s simple, yet direct, like the prose of Hemingway.
So as they say, the early bird catches the worm and Jeremy, my luscious worm, arrived in the library with a serious case of bed head, looking and smelling freshly fucked, the slut. He had slapped on some of his signature cologne to cover up the raw smell of sex, but it didn’t completely mask the odor of his last client’s cha-cha. Oh well. I suppose I’ll be getting sloppy seconds. I hope he has something left in the tank for
Mark Tufo, Monique Happy, Zelio Vogta