Free Blood & Tacos #3 by Stephen Mertz, Todd Robinson, Rob Kroese, Chris La Tray, Garnett Elliott Page B

let it sizzle a minute. Now add the stock and Burr it to gruel. Now add your green leeks and let it simmer for a while. If you get this one right, the ambassador will invite you to his table, making it much easier to kill him/seduce her.
    All right, get out there and make some soup, Seagal.
    D. Richard Pearce is the author of the stories " The Once and Future Dentist " (
Escape Pod 13
) about everyone’s favourite gunman (or at least his) and " El Alebrije " (
GUD issue 2
). While he has seduced with his cooking, he finds it handy to keep a bottle of Tanqueray in reserve, just in case…

STUDS WINSLOW and the Bitches
of the Fifth Reich
    By Halloran Oates
    (discovered by Todd Robinson)
    TODD ROBINSON has always modeled his life after the deep-sea diving adventure hero Studs Winslow. Which explains his penchant for challenging people to see who can hold their breath the longest and Speedos. He found this copy of
Studs Winslow #94
in a mylar bag right between #93 and #95 on his Studs Winslow shelf/shrine at home.
    Halloran Oates (1922–1998), a WWII veteran and deep-sea salvage expert, wrote 109 novels featuring Winslow and one unfortunate nonfiction book disproving the female orgasm. He passed away in 1998 while trying to break the world record for Antarctic Nude Freediving at the age of 76. He broke the record first, though.
     
    Studs Winslow focused his breathing, eyes open a sliver.
    Deep in.
    Hold.
    Slooooow exhale.
    He blocked out the cries of the Caribbean seabirds swirling above his boat,
The Goateed Mollusk IV.
He pushed away the warmth of the blistering equatorial sun. He tasted the salty ocean air on each breath he drew deeply into his belly.
    Exhale.
    The gentle rise and fall of the boat helped with the breathing meditations he’d been taught by Master Fang Fang in the lost city of Quangtang. Lost, that is, until Studs had found it. (Check out the exciting adventure in
Studs Winslow and the Lost City of Master Fang Fang
.)
    After he’d fought off the nine dead soldiers of Emperor Hing and released the city from its thousand-year curse, the grateful Master Fang Fang had rewarded Studs with the secret practices of his temple. One of which was the meditative breathing that allowed him to make the deep dive that he’d soon be undertaking.
    He drew his attention to a point of red on the horizon.
    Deep in.
    Hold.
    Slooooow exhale.
    The point of red turned a chocolate brown, then the darker hue of untainted coffee. Then that point split into two as Studs realized that he was now staring at the perfect nipples adorning the breasts of Cookie Cutter.
    “Damn, Studs, you not done yet with that Chinese hoodee-doo?” Cookie shook her head, playfully expelling the water from her regal afro.
    Studs wiped the water from his muscular, sunburned chest. “You’d think that a woman with your education would have a little more respect for the ancient arts,” Studs said as he flipped an unfiltered Lucky between his lips.
    “Damn, Winslow. You know me. You can take the girl out of Detroit …”
    “Then send that girl to Oxford, then Harvard. Offer her the highest academic honors and dual doctorates in archeology and mystical artifacts …”
    “… but you ain’t gonna take the Detroit outta that girl.” Cookie smiled at Studs as she wrapped her arms around his rippling waist, her soft pillowy breasts pressing against his ribs. She reached into the front of his bellbottom jeans, under his swim trunks.
    “I hope you’re not starting the fun without me,” said Lily, the Swedish backpacker they’d picked up at Dirty Jack’s Oyster Bar the night before.
    Lily hadn’t been Studs’ first choice. Studs had wanted to take the local waitress with them, but Cookie had one sexual rule and one sexual rule only—only one black girl at a time on Studs’ boat. She said that two Nubians at a time brought out “the Africa” in her. Studs had no idea what that meant, but he was curious to find out one day.
    As Lily pulled