Free Fill Me by Crystal Kaswell Page B

anything to help bring you up to awesome?"
    "Let me deal with it on my own."
    She nods. "I don't want to ruin our day. I want to have fun dragging you to all the places I went to in college." She laughs. "And I have awesome plans tonight. You like burlesque, right?"
    "I love burlesque."
    "Great, because I already bought tickets to this amazing performance. It's totally famous in the performance art community. And that is all going to be so much more fun if I'm not worried that you're planning your next binge."
    "I'm not."
    "Are you sure?" she asks.
    "I won't be. If you let off with the 'don't order oatmeal' shit."
    "But oatmeal is so..."
    "Jesus Christ. Did I miss some kind of memo where all the cool kids decided to hate on oatmeal eternally?" I ask.
    She nods. "You haven't been cool in a long time." She takes a long sip of her coffee, formulating some response. "So are you really okay?"
    "I really am."
    She sighs, her shoulders relaxing as her lips curve into a smile. "Then I'll stop."
    "Good." I take another long sip of my coffee, trying to taste every note of flavor. To think about something besides this conversation.
    Laurie is always protective, but this isn't like her. There has to be some reason...
    There can only be one reason for this.
    Luke.
    He must have put her up to this. I bite my lip. I'm sure he meant well, but I'm sick of it. I'm sick of everyone looking at me like I'm about to break.
    "Laurie," I say.
    "You know there are male performers in the show. I think they're gay, but they're still hot."
    "It's not like you to bring up my eating."
    "Oh, well, you know... I was concerned."
    "You were or Luke was?" I ask.
    "We both were."
    "You two were talking about me?"
    "I ran into him."
    "Where?"
    She clears her throat. "He stopped by to say hello."
    "Hello, spy on my girlfriend."
    "He's worried about you."
    "So he should talk to me," I say.
    Laurie brings her attention to me. Her eyes are balls of fire behind her red glasses. "Don't take this the wrong way, but do you actually let him talk to you?"
    "Of course I--"
    "Do you tell him when you're upset? When you need help?"
    I bite my lip. I do. Sometimes. I may not go into lurid detail, but I talk to Luke about how I feel. More or less. "Sometimes."
    "Well, there's a reason why he's worried. I'm not saying you need to tell him every tiny thought you have, but he's obviously not getting enough. Maybe you could tell him something to ease his mind."
    "You're never on his side."
    "I'm not on anyone's side. I want you two to live happily ever after together. But it isn't going to happen if you don't talk to him."
    "Maybe."
    "Think about it. It would be a shame to lose someone who loves you so much," she says.
    Does she really think I'm pushing Luke that hard? Does she really think I might lose him?
    The waitress returns with our food, and I push the thoughts away. Laurie is here and we're going to have fun. We aren't going to sit in this little café wallowing.
    Laurie slides her fork into her chocolate chip pancakes. Then she brings the fork to her lips and devours them. "Oh my God, Alyssa, you have to try these." She clears her throat. "If you want."
    "Okay."
    "Really?"
    I nod, and take a bite of the pancakes. It's a tiny bite, but it's something.
    They're good, sweet with a rich cocoa flavor. Laurie practically squeals over my taking a bite, and I know she'll leave me be for the rest of the day.
    I no longer merit concern.
    Now I have to figure out a way to convince Luke of the same thing.

 
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
    CHAPTER TWELVE
    Luke
     
    Your plan has been exposed. Your operative cracked like a walnut and it really didn't take much. I have her under my control now. It was smart recruiting someone from my side, turning her into a double agent, but perhaps I can turn her into a double-double agent (whatever the hell it's called). I'll keep her in your good graces. You'll think she's working for you pretending to work for me, but really