my eyes, hating to admit defeat. “Still, you have to admit…I’m ready for this mission.”
“Well, you certainly look like you’re ready to murder just about every vampire you lay eyes on.”
My eyes narrowed at the thought. It was true. I wanted to make my first vampire kill. Desperately. Soon, Ben…very soon…
We were off to New York. We’d been tipped off that a group of vampires—whose coven had recently been destroyed by a team of hunters—would be passing through the city that night on their way to seek refuge at a new coven. The plan was to attack at the break of dawn—thus giving us the advantage of sunlight.
“Have you ever seen a vampire die by one of these bullets?” I asked, holding my gun up, pointing it at the mock vampire target a considerable distance away from us. We were using ultraviolet-ray bullets.
Zinnia licked her lips and nodded. “It’s an interesting sight, though it’s not as lethal as a stake through the heart.”
“Why’s that?”
“We’re not sure why, but the bullets have different effects on different vampires. Some immediately combust…others…well, they die a slow, painful death. We’re not really sure yet why the effects aren’t the same for everyone.”
I imagined what it would feel like to shoot one of those bullets right through a vampire’s heart. I wondered what it would feel like if the vampire was Claudia. Seeing her scream in pain, her lithe body writhing on the ground...after everything she did to me, I couldn’t keep the wicked smile from forming on my lips as I pulled the trigger once again.
“It’s a different kind of feeling. You really don’t expect it to be like that,” Zinnia said pensively, as if reading my mind. “Killing vampires…especially your first kill…”
I frowned at her, surprised by the careful tone her voice took on. I straightened to my full height, slightly bending my neck in order to look her in the eye. “What do you mean? What’s it like?”
“It’s hard to describe. After what you lost at the hands of vampires, after all that time training to kill…” She shrugged, her eyes glazing over with tormented memories. For a moment, I thought that she felt sorry, but I realized that the glaze in her eyes was not out of regret, but glee. “There’s just this sense of pure satisfaction, knowing that in a small way, you’ve avenged those you’ve lost.”
I stared at her, never before having been introduced to this cold, dark side of her. The look in her eyes sent chills down my spine. I never thought I’d be so disturbed by a girl as petite as Zinnia Wolfe.
“The horrified look in that girl’s eyes as I saw life fade away from her...I’ll never forget it. It’s true what they say…your first kill will always stay with you. I still see her in my dreams…”
“And you didn’t feel any regret or compassion toward her?” My breath slightly hitched at the thought. “Ever?”
She shrugged. “There’s a reason I say ‘in my dreams’ and not ‘in my nightmares’.”
I studied Zinnia carefully, wondering if she was serious. She was always so fun and lighthearted. She was definitely one of the toughest girls I’d ever come across in my life. Still, she was a teenager like me. What could’ve caused her to harbor this much apathy and hatred? It was strange seeing her act and speak in such a serious, pensive manner. It was so unlike the Zinnia I’d gotten used to.
“Once you go on this mission, Ben, understand that things will never be the same for you again. You really should know exactly what you’re getting yourself into, because once you do this, there’s no going back.”
I gave it a moment’s thought, but I couldn’t relate to what she was saying—not at that moment, not completely. Thus, I just nodded and said, “Thanks, Zinnia. Don’t worry about me. I know exactly what I’m getting into.”
I didn’t realize what a lie that was until the morning of the mission.
Everything