Free The Jane Austen Handbook by Margaret C. Sullivan Page B

and styles that had never been seen before. Exotic items such as cashmere shawls became commonplace, and victories in battle inspired fashion; even Jane Austen succumbed, borrowing a “Mamalouc cap,” a sort of turban, from a friend to wear to a ball after the Royal Navy defeated Napoleon at the Battle of the Nile. Military-style trim on ladies’ outerwear was common around the time of the Battle of Waterloo in 1815.



HOW TO CHOOSE A PROSPECTIVE HUSBAND
    Tell Mary that I make over Mr. Heartley & all his Estate to her for her sole use and Benefit in future, & not only him, but all my other Admirers into the bargain wherever she can find them, even the kiss which C. Powlett wanted to give me, as I mean to confine myself in future to Mr. Tom Lefroy, for whom I do not care sixpence
. — LETTER FROM J ANE A USTEN TO C ASSANDRA A USTEN , J ANUARY 14, 1796
    As a Regency lady, choosing a husband is the most important decision you will make in your life. Once you’re married, you’re stuck with him. Divorce is possible but extremely difficult and expensive, especially for women; in most marriages, men control the fortune. And while a rich man with a fancy estate is all very well—and indeed one should not marry a poor man—do some soul-searching before you accept, and go into the match with your eyes wide open. Ask yourself the following questions—and answer them honestly!
    •  Does he have a good income? While one should not mind being asked to economize a little, one would not wish to be put to constant pains to contrive the elegancies of life.
    •  Does he have good principles? Bad boys are all very well for girlhood crushes, but do not marry one with the idea that you might “change” him. He will spend all your father’s money and leave you at home with the children. Find a good man and treasure him.
    •  Is he handsome? He should be, if at all possible—or at least very near it.
    •  Is he a sensible man? One would not wish for a silly or stupid husband. However, if one wishes only for an establishment of one’s own, at least be sure he is not stubborn as well. If he is easily controlled, you can contrive to almost entirely avoid being in his company.
    •  Does he have a sense of humor? If not, you will need to teach him to be laughed at. If your manners are lively and easy, this will complement his gravity well. In fact, that is probably what made you attractive to him.
    •  Does he love you? You do not want to marry a man who only is marrying you for fortune or position, because he feels an obligation towards you, or because of a passing infatuation. When these quick passions wear off, your life together may become intolerable. If you cannot love your husband, at least you should be able to respect your partner in life.
    •  Do you love him? The most important question of all. Your choice in a husband may provide you with more fine clothes and fine carriages than your sisters and friends, but will they make you happy? If he is a good man, and has made you love him, then your chance for a happy marriage is very good indeed.
    MARRYING FOR MONEY VS. MARRYING FOR LOVE
    Not long before Jane Austen’s time, the upper classes did not choose a mate on the basis of attraction or affection. One great fortune looked for another, and if affection came into play as well, it was merely a lucky coincidence. However, the nineteenth century brought new ideas, and a heroine could at last declare, as did Emma Watson in Jane Austen’s unfinished work
The Watsons
, that she “would rather be Teacher at a school (and I can think of nothing worse) than marry a Man I did not like.”
    Elizabeth Bennet’s offer from Mr. Collins in
Pride and Prejudice
would have been a very good one in the eyes of her contemporaries, and better than she could expect given her lack of inheritance. And her initial rejection of Mr. Darcy, a very rich man, was even more outrageous in view of the common wisdom of the day. However, the