Free Mission: Earth "Villainy Victorious" by Ron L. Hubbard Page A

Madison, when the beast in her is fed, she will be more kind.
    He waited until her face looked relaxed and then he said, "Teenie, common humanity says that you should help me."
    She shrugged. "Why should I? Did you help me on the yacht? No. You didn't even attempt to persuade that (bleeped) Gris to stay aboard! You ran right off with him!"
    Ah, so that was what was biting her. No reason to stir it up further: he would try another tack, earnest and sincere. Even frank!"Teenie, I've got to succeed as a PR here. Otherwise I'll never be accepted back on Earth. Did you ever hear of Wister?"
    "The Whiz Kid? Yeah, I read something. And that (bleeping) (bleep) (bleep) Gris was snarling about him one day."
    "Well, Teenie, the Whiz Kid was really Jettero Heller, a Royal officer of Voltar. And I'm in trouble. I never completed my job on him."
    "That's your (bleep), baby. Not mine."
    Madison was beginning to feel desperate. That obituary was drifting to the last page, below the classifieds. "Teenie, I've got to make motions of putting Hisst on the throne."
    "So what's that to me? He doesn't and won't give a (bleep) what's happening in Palace City. He never even talks to the Lords here and they sure won't talk to him, no matter what he calls himself. He's just a rat from Slum City: he'd still have to rule through the Grand Council. He's got them all drugged up, but even so he can only push them so far. They privately laugh at him behind his back. Even if he gets put on the throne he won't last any time at all. I know what I'm talking about, because I been through page school now and I know all the pages and they know everything! So all I've got to do is keep in good with the catamites, raise lots of Mary Jane and sit here in my queen's palace having fun. I've got it made."
    Madison's obituary even lost its subtitle. Desperation boiled over. He got down on his knees. "Please, Teenie. Oh, please, help me!"
    She laughed at him. She snapped her fingers in yet a different way and two young boys, about twelve, ran out of a hall, stopped before her and bowed.
    "You've got to excuse me, Madison," said Teenie. "I have a class starting shortly."
    All sorts of arguments were racing through Madison's head. He was hastily examining her own assessment of her situation to see if he could punch any holes in it. Having worked for Rockecenter, he knew that madmen could not be dismissed so lightly. But all he could come up with was that she had INFLUENCE and he needed it desperately.
    Then suddenly he registered what she was doing. He was horrified for more reasons than one. Good Heavens, she was going to disgrace herself and not even be able to help him if she would. She had gone insane!
    She had signalled to the two boys before her and they were grinning in a knowing way and taking off their clothes!
    "No, no!" cried Madison. "Not here! This is a public audience hall!"
    Teenie smiled. She said, "I know. And the audience will be here soon. Bye-bye, Madison. If you ever get back to Earth, say hello to Broadway."
    Madison knelt there, suffering. He ignored the dismissal. Somehow, some way, he would make her listen to his plea, but right now she seemed to be well on the way to destroying her public image. The huge entrance doors weren't even closed!
    The first little boy was looking down, grinning.
    Teenie reached her hand out.
    Madison stared. He was horrified. "Teenie! What are you doing? Don't make that boy into a queer! Take that out of your mouth!"
    Teenie leaned back and looked in disdain at Madison. "They're not being made into queers, idiot. They'll be top-grade catamites when I'm done. It's still early and
    I'm just playing around waiting for the audience. You should see what happens then!"
    He could see liveried people watching for her bidding in the halls. She was really going to destroy herself before she could be of any possible use to him! He said hastily in English, "Teenie, don't perform sexual acts in public! The thing you did there is not