Free Stef Ann Holm by Lucy gets Her Life Back Page B

hadn’t; he’d been way too immature to consider it. He lost his virginity two years later, to Stacy Ritter, a middle school cheerleader who’d taken one look at him and said to her friends, “I’ve got to get me some of that.”

    Ever since, women had been looking at him like he was the best eye candy on the block. And sometimes he felt like just another piece that was made to satisfy.

    Early on, when he started dating, he never did stuff alone with a girlfriend unless it was to have sex in his car, or her bedroom when her parents weren’t home. He always made sure they went out with other couples. It saved him from dealing with being in a relationship and dealing with real stuff. He had no experience with forming an emotional bond.

    Eventually, his mother left one night and never came back home. They figured out where she was some ten years later. She’d remarried, which was illegal, since she was still married to his dad. The details of exactly what had happened were never explained to Drew. Only his dad had the answers, and he’d died a couple of years later, just before Drew signed on with the minors.

    If it hadn’t been for baseball, Drew would have had a lost life, drifting in and out of one thing for another—just like his dad.

    Sports saved him.

    The love of the game was what pulled him up, took him into a world he didn’t fully understand.

    Baseball made him a man.

    Some would debate just what kind of man. He’d done so many things he regretted while playing for the majors, but a person couldn’t reverse the clock and take everything back. It was a part of who he was, what had molded him.

    If it hadn’t been for that steroid story breaking wide-open—

    Drew’s cell phone rang, the melody making him grimace. He really had to change that ringer.

    Pushing the talk button, he said, “Tolman.”

    “Drew, it’s Lynette.”

    Drew stopped heading for the stands, where the parents and kids had begun to arrive.

    Every time Caroline’s sister called, his pulse slowed and felt thick in his veins. Lynette took in Mackenzie after Caroline died. He always wondered if this would be the call that would send his daughter to him, and he could try and make things up to her.

    “Lynette, how’re you doing?”

    “Fine. You?”

    “Good enough. Starting Little League today.”

    “That’s nice for ya’ll,” she drawled.

    He switched the cell phone from one ear to the other. A pause lingered, Drew rubbing his jaw and feeling the grit of stubble. The dead span of time was more than he could take.

    “Has she changed her mind?” he asked, his chest tight.

    “I told her you have a ticket for her to fly to Idaho whenever she’s ready, but she doesn’t want to come. I’m sorry, Drew.”

    Not the news he wanted, but he’d expected as much. He knew he’d really screwed this one up, and fixing it might never be an option. But he wasn’t going to stop trying.

    “I sort of figured.”

    “I wish I could make her, but I think that’s the wrong way to go.”

    “Agree.”

    “I’ll keep talking to her about it. I’ve tried to get her thoughts about your trip up here in February, but she doesn’t say much about it. I know getting you two together is what Caroline wanted, and that’s what I’ve been telling Mackenzie, but she’s head-strong, Drew. She’s a lot like you.”

    He adjusted the bill of his ball cap. “Yep. No doubt.”

    More boys were arriving, and Drew forced the emptiness from his heart. He was always surrounded by people, and needed that social company, but nobody would ever know how badly he missed family. He continued to hope his daughter would give him half a chance to be in her life. Only Jacquie knew about Mackenzie. Nobody else in Red Duck would have guessed he had a kid, a girl who looked like him.

    Some secrets were easy to keep, especially when the secret wanted nothing to do with him. If Mackenzie would only give him a chance, maybe she could see he wasn’t