Free Willing Captive by Belle Aurora Page B

that?”
    Chuckling, I roll my
eyes at her over dramatics. Suddenly remember this morning’s rude
awakening, I crook my finger and her eyes widen. Her feet shuffle
slowly towards me. Once she’s a few feet away, I bend at the waist
until we’re almost nose to nose. I half whisper, “Where were you
this morning?”
    Her face softens.
She whispers back, “You were tired. And it was my fault. I thought
I’d let you sleep.”
    “ That’s not what I asked.”
    Our quiet
conversation has drawn the attention of Boo, who stands over at the
breakfast bar leaning towards us, straining to hear what she can.
When she catches my glare, she makes a ‘pffft’ sound and goes back
to cooking.
    By the expression on
Lily’s face, I can see she doesn’t get what the big deal is. I
explain softly, “I’m responsible for you. Not Boo. Not Rock. Me. Me
alone. I get that you weren’t far, but I need to know where you
are. Every second of every day. I know you’re pissed-”
    Cutting me off, she
says quietly, “That’s just it. I’m not pissed. Not anymore. You
were right. I’ve moved on. I-” Avoiding my eyes, she admits, “I
want to start fresh, too.”
    … Say what?
    Lily avoids my gaze
a few seconds longer before our eyes meet. Her green eyes wide and
doe-like. My gut tells me to watch my back. Closely. Narrowing my
eyes, I assure, “I don’t know what you’re up to, Delilah. But I’m
onto you.”
    Shock momentarily
forms on her face; just as quickly, it transforms to anger. She
hisses, “You’re out of your mind! I’m calling a truce here, Nox.
I’m only offering this once, so take it or leave it.”
    Against my better
judgment, I take her small, outstretched hand and pump it twice. As
soon as I let go, she smiles, “See? Not so hard, was it?”
    Without answering, I
walk over to the breakfast bar, take an apple, and bite into it.
From behind me, I hear, “So I was wondering if I could speak to my
sister?”
    Oh boy.
    Turning, I make a
show of slowly chewing. Sliding her eyes down to my mouth, her lips
part, she swallows hard and quickly looks away.
    What was that?
    A dark smirk forms
on my face, “I see. Truce, huh? So you’ll only cooperate if I do
what you want? Nice try, Lily. Not how it works.” Turning my back,
I start to walk away when I’m held back.
    Lily grips my hand
tightly, her eyes plead. “No! That’s not what I meant.” Placing a
hand on her chest, she breathes deeply. Swallowing hard, her eyes
flutter and she lets go of my hand, placing it on her chest.
    I’ve seen this
before.
    Panic attack.
    Stepping forward, I take hold of her waist and guide her to a
chair at the dining table. Sitting her down, she wipes the sweat
off her forehead with an unsteady hand and heaves, “Sorry…” Pant . “I don’t know what’s…” Pant , “happening to me.”
    Feeling like an
asshole, I clear my throat and begin, “I think you’re developing
panic attacks.”
    Still heaving in
deeply, she squawks, “What? No way!”
    “ Yeah. So you need to tell me what’s bothering you so we can
fix it.”
    Lily looks up in thought, her breathing slows slightly and she
replies, “My family. Not being able to talk with them. It makes
me…thinky…and…itchy.”
    Should’ve seen this
coming.
    Opening my mouth to
answer, Lily cuts me off with, “How about if you let me talk to my
dad and sister once a week? You name the day and time and what I
can and can’t talk about.” Hope flares in her Granny-apple-green
eyes. “I’ll listen. I swear. I’ll do whatever you say. Just knowing
I’m not cut off from them helps. I’m feeling better already. Look!”
She pats her forehead and shows me her dry fingers.
    Doesn’t matter what
I do, I’m always gonna be the bad guy to Lily. I know it shouldn’t
bother me, but fuck me, it does. Knowing I can’t give her what she
needs to feel safe and happy while she’s in my care…it blows. Okay,
so she’s the first young woman I’ve had to watch, but