Free Well-Tempered Clavicle by Piers Anthony Page B

herself. “I’m so embarrassed!” she said.
    “I think we can handle this,” Dawn said, setting down the cat. “Take my dress.” She pulled it off and gave it to SOGA. The sight of her bra and panties didn’t affect Aaron, because he was already freaked out.
    “But why?” SOGA asked.
    “Because you don’t want to freak him out again,” Dawn explained. “Put on the dress, snap your fingers, and kiss him. Meanwhile I’ll go find another dress.” She walked away.
    Picka realized that Dawn was definitely up to something.
    Evidently bemused, SOGA put on the dress, which fit her reasonably well because Dawn’s figure was nymphlike. Then she snapped her fingers.
    Aaron snapped out of his freak. “What happened?” he asked.
    SOGA kissed him.
    Little hearts flew out. In a moment Aaron drew back. “Let’s find somewhere private.”
    “But my arms,” she protested.
    “You have arms?”
    “Horrendous ones.”
    He yanked his eyes away from her face and clothed body. “Did I burn them?”
    “No. They’re too tough to burn. After all, they can tunnel through the ground. But they aren’t pretty.”
    “You have other qualities.”
    “Use the shelter,” Aliena said, evidently regretting her prior attitude. “We’ll manage.”
    They went into the shelter.
    “Who would have thought it,” Tom said. “She does have scary arms, but the rest of her is something else.”
    “And it seems that all any man cares about is that something else,” Aliena said wryly.
    Dawn returned, wearing a newly harvested dress. “You knew that would happen!” Joy’nt said.
    “Middy knew,” Dawn said. “I merely followed his advice and let them discover each other. He simply needed to see more than her arms.”
    “He did,” Aliena said. “I’m sorry I was so prejudiced. She seems like a nice girl.”
    “She is,” Dawn agreed. “And right for Aaron, because his hot hands can’t hurt her tough arms when he gets excited.” She allowed half a smile to escape. “And he’s very excited now.”
    After a brief but reasonable while, Aaron and SOGA emerged from the shelter. “We’re in love,” he said.
    “Of course,” Dawn agreed, as if that were only natural. Picka realized that the urgencies of living flesh were such that it might indeed be natural. The two knew almost nothing about each other except for the contact of their bodies, but it seemed that sufficed.
    They took different sections of the shelter, with the new couple in one corner and the skeletons patrolling outside. The frequent sounds of kissing didn’t seem to bother the three other females or the pets.
    *   *   *
    In the morning the people went their various ways. Picka, Joy’nt, and Dawn mounted their bicycles, following Woofer, and Tweeter and Midrange rode on or in baskets.
    By noon they reached the great Gap Chasm. Picka and Joy’nt had seen it before, but it remained impressive. It was a huge crack in the ground, so deep that a few small clouds were floating in it below the normal ground level. Deep within it, they knew, ran the dreaded Gap Dragon, Stanley Steamer. Except that he wasn’t dread to Dawn or the skeletons, who knew him from way back.
    Woofer turned, heading east. There was no enchanted path there. They would have to tackle the rest of their trip by foot.
    They put the bicycles by the edge of the chasm, for future use, and oriented on the unenchanted wilderness. The easy part of their travel was over.
    Somewhere, not far away, was Attila the Pun.

 
    5
    A TTILA
    They plowed into the wilderness south of the Gap Chasm, following Woofer, who was sniffing more avidly. That suggested that they were getting close.
    Suddenly in the thicket they came to a sign: BEWARE THE BANKS . Woofer paused there, uncertain.
    “What is it, Woofer?” Dawn asked, touching his back. Then she answered herself. “We are about to enter a region stiflingly thick with puns. They are so dense they are obscuring the smell of Attila. Woofer has lost the scent