Free BoysLikeYou.indd by Juliana Stone Page A

girlfriend, Gina. I’d seen them earlier, at the festival, and wasn’t surprised they had ended up out here. It’s not like there
    was much else to do on Saturday night in Twin Oaks.
    Gina’s eyes narrowed on Monroe, her glossy lips pulled tight
    in a fake smile as she flexed her claws.
    “Where’s Rach?” she asked, though her eyes never quite made
    it to my face.
    “Not here,” I answered.
    “I can see that.” She snapped her gum and smiled. “And who
    are you exactly?” That was for Monroe.
    “No one,” Monroe answered, before tugging on my arm.
    “Are you going to play for me?”
    “Come on, Everets. What’s a party without some tunes?”
    Brent said.
    “I don’t know, man. I haven’t picked up in forever.” I took
    another long swig of beer and then crushed the can before
    shoving my hands into my front pockets. “I’ve probably lost my
    calluses, and knowing the way you’ve got your action rigged, my
    fingers will kill tomorrow.”
    “Pussy,” Brent laughed. “Get your ass over here.”
    He was near the fire and Monroe was two steps behind him.
    For a second, my eyes rested on her perfect round ass. On the
    way her hair swung down her back and how cute her feet looked
    with her green toes.
    She turned, ignoring all the curious stares, and looked directly
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    at me. For that one moment, it felt as if she was looking into my soul and she knew how badly I wanted to play.
    “I want to hear you, Nate.” Her voice was soft, so soft, like a
    whisper inside my head.
    “Sugar, if you sweet- talked me up like that, I’d do anything
    you wanted,” Brent said with a laugh as he bent closer to
    her. “Anything.”
    He turned to me and held out a beat- up Epiphone. Trevor’s
    beat- up Epiphone.
    “He’d want you to play, man.” Gone was the laughter from
    Brent’s face. “You need to play.”
    I stared at the guitar for so long that my eyes blurred, and
    when they began to sting, I knew this had been a bad idea. I
    should never have come here.
    “No,” I said, shoving my hands deeper into my pockets before
    I turned away from them. “It’s not gonna happen.”
    I walked back toward Monroe’s car and let the darkness slide
    over me.
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Chapter Eleven
Monroe
    I dreamt about Malcolm, which was something I hadn’t done
    in months.
    And sure, I should have seen it coming after my hospital
    visit— I didn’t have to be a rocket scientist to know it would
    trigger all the bad things I’d been trying to forget— but still…I wasn’t ready.
    I wasn’t ready to see his wavy blond hair touching tanned
    skin, or that one long piece that always fell over his eyebrow. I wasn’t ready for the freckles along the bridge of his nose, so light they appeared to be sprinkles of cinnamon. Or his long lashes
    and the way they licked the tops of his cheeks when his eyes
    were closed. It hurt to see his dimple, the birthmark just under
    his collarbone, and the way it felt as if I was his entire world
    when he looked at me.
    I wasn’t ready for any of it, and that’s why I woke up with
    screams in my throat, wiping sweat from my brow, my teeth
    clenched so tightly I was sure I’d ground them down another layer.
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    Juliana Ston e
    The ache in my heart felt like it was crushing me from
    the inside out, and for a few moments, I lay there shaking,
    sobbing quietly. I stuffed my fist into my mouth because it
    was late, or rather it was early in the morning, and I didn’t
    want to wake Gram.
    She didn’t need to see me like this. Weak and broken. I knew
    she had hope. Hope that I’d come out of this summer ahead,
    maybe part- way whole.
    I also knew that her hope was false, but I didn’t want to
    crush it.
    The panic, though, was real, and I knew the drill so I counted
    backward, starting at twenty. I had to do it more than once