Free Little Kids, Big City: Tales from a Real House in New York City (With Lessons on Life and Love for Your Own Concrete Jungle) by Alex McCord, Simon van Kempen Page B

This has meant since day one that, apart from the occasional visit, we have had no local family support to fall back on. It’s one of the reasons we decided with Johan’s impending birth to hire a live-in au pair in lieu of having a mother or mother-in-law down the street or in the next suburb to call on.
     
    Alex
    We used to plan surprise trips for one another, which is more difficult with kids, but have channeled those ideas into more local fare. Eight and a half months pregnant with François, my 30th birthday was looming. We would normally do a tasting menu at a Michelin-starred restaurant complete with jewels and serenading (just kidding about the last bit, sort of ), but at 37 weeks gone food was not particularly high on my list. What to do? Simon chartered a helicopter and for an hour or so we flew all around the city—over Central Park, over our apartment building, Yankee Stadium and the rest. Another time he chartered a yacht, complete with surprise party and private chef, as we sailed around the New York Harbor. We’re lucky to live in a city where at any given moment you can find something to do that you’ve never done before. When planning Simon’s 44th, I struggled for ideas. I’d thought of taking him to St. Barths for the weekend, but we’d been very busy at work and not seeing enough of the boys, etc. It wasn’t a good time to go away. Instead, I got the boys involved in planning the festivities. François had recently discovered the joys of seeing a movie in a theatre—we have a great art house cinema on our corner with a brilliantly curated children’s series twice a month. He suggested we have cake and goodies at home, then see a first-run film. With our nanny’s assistance, the boys decorated the living room all afternoon. I ordered and picked up a cake from a bakery near my office and left work with just enough extra time to pick up the movie tickets, which for some reason weren’t available online that day. What to buy someone you’ve known for almost 10 years? Rather than cufflinks, cologne or gadgets, I thought about things he loves but doesn’t spend time on, and came up with music. These days it’s rare for either of us to spend much time inside a music store, and frankly most are gone, along with the joy of browsing through racks and picking up actual CDs as opposed to downloading them. I selected a collection of the latest discs from his favorite artists, which was a hit. After our tea party at home with cake, the four of us went to see Horton Hears a Who (the boys’ choice, of course!). Following the theatre, a friend of the family whom the boys adore was present at home to put them to bed, while Simon and I went out for a nice dinner at a restaurant we love.
     

    Helicopter Mama, Three Weeks Before François’ Birth

     
    One thing Simon and I agreed upon when we decided to have children is that I would handle dirty diapers and related accidents, and he would handle vomit. As for merely wet diapers, whoever got there first changed them. Although he and I both have very strong stomachs and aren’t squeamish, the one smell in the world that gets me is vomit—I just absolutely cannot stand it. Simon, on the other hand, isn’t horribly fazed by it—his Achilles heel is feces in the various forms that come out of children’s bottoms at appropriate and sometimes inappropriate times such as the middle of Thanksgiving festivities, while learning to use the toilet. It’s not a hard-and-fast rule—neither of us would ever walk away from a child or a floor in need of clean up—but when we are both at home, it is a thoughtful division of labor. Example A: François throws up on the floor. Simon will swoop in, strip off the clothes and pick up the mess while I comfort F, clean his face and get him new clothes. Example B: While Johan learned to use the potty, we kept one in every room with wipes nearby. He was very good at getting himself there, but not so good at remembering to wipe