Free Titanium Security Series 4 - Extinguished by Cross Kaylea Page B

dissected that phrase and combined it with the flash of emotion he’d seen in her eyes a minute ago, a flash of realization hit him. Whoa, wait. He sucked in a breath, nearly staggered back under the impact of the insight that left him reeling.
    Had Jordyn been into him? Seriously into him in a way he’d never in a million years suspected, let alone given himself permission to even dream about?
    Blake searched her face, needing to know for certain that’s what she’d just implied. Looking back now, he realized he might not have imagined the longing and wistfulness he’d seen in her eyes during his last few visits with her family.
    Oh, Jesus. He swallowed, aware that his heart was thudding against his chest wall. “I never thought—I didn’t realize you…” He trailed off, not knowing what the hell to say or what to think, and blurting out useless shit would only make things worse.
    He’d known she’d had a crush on him for a while, but never thought it meant anything. Had it been way more than that to her? For the first time he allowed himself to examine and admit his long-buried feelings for her. A wave of regret slammed into him. He fucking worshipped the ground she walked on. Thought she was talented, smart and funny, loyal and sexy as hell.
    She cocked her head at him, narrowed her eyes in suspicion. “What, you thought I was just looking for a fuck buddy that night?”
    He didn’t answer, because that’s exactly what he’d thought. The night of Jamie’s funeral, he’d mistakenly assumed she’d been acting out of grief and loneliness, turning to him to make the pain stop and nothing more.
    He still couldn’t comprehend the magnitude of all this; that she’d wanted more than sex. Evidently a hell of a lot more. The Marine Corps had trained him to be an elite observer, an expert on noticing things about people most others didn’t. So how the hell had he missed the signs of how she’d felt about him? Or had he just not let himself see them? He ran a hand over his hair, suddenly realizing just how badly he’d fucked this up.
    When he didn’t respond, she snorted and shook her head at him in disgust. “God, you’re such a jackass.”
    No, he was a total fucking idiot . “I had no idea you thought of me that way.” It was true. But a primal leap of triumph swept through his veins at her admission. He knew Jordyn. Knew she didn’t give her heart easily, and when she did, she gave it wholeheartedly. That devastated look on her face when he’d told her why he’d dropped out of her life? It made all kinds of sense now. God.
    But that unease still twisted inside him, the one that warned she wasn’t for him and that he’d be stupid to risk his heart that way again.
    “Yeah, got that loud and clear. So, can we move on now?” Her eyes blazed with anger and pride, her cheeks bright pink. “Whatever, like I said, I’m over it. Let’s just both be adults and deal with it. Fresh start, beginning now.” She turned away and took a step toward the door.
    “Wait.” He shot out a hand and grabbed her forearm in a firm grip. Not hard enough to hurt, but hard enough that she’d have to use force to get free.
    She paused and turned her head toward him slightly but didn’t meet his eyes. “What?” she snapped, tension rolling off her in waves.
    He so wasn’t having this conversation with her back to him.
    He tugged her around to face him and waited, letting the silence stretch out until she was forced to meet his gaze. Her guard was up; he could see it in the rigid set of her shoulders and the tension around her mouth and eyes.
    Blake shook his head, feeling awed and devastated at the same time. He should have told her all this months ago. “I’ve felt guilty as shit for even thinking about you as anything but a friend, let alone the way I have for the past three years, and you’re telling me now that all this time you’ve wanted more?” Every time he’d thought about anything other than a