Free Blue Crush by Jules Barnard Page B

what you think.”
    God, now I sound like Lewis. Cali’s acting more crazed than normal, but is she right? Am I letting down my guard too soon?
    “You’re doing it all over. Did you learn nothing the first time? Get a clue, Gen, this guy is using you!”
    Okay, now I’m pissed. I may have made errors in judgment when it came to men in the past, but I never allowed someone to use me. As soon as I figured out a guy was a dipshit, I cut him loose.
    “And you know so much about men? Did you know Eric hit on me? He wanted to sleep with me, Cali.”
    “What?”
    Shit, that’s not how I wanted to tell her.
    I had every intention of telling Cali what Eric did. I should have told her when it happened, but he made me feel so dirty. I wanted to forget about it, though I knew I couldn’t. I was waiting for the right moment and somehow it never came. Now …
    Cali’s face is a mix of shock and anger. I waited too long—I wasn’t thinking.
    I plead with my eyes. “I’m sorry. I should have told you sooner.”
    My cell phone vibrates in the side pocket of my tote. It buzzes twice more within seconds. I glance at the screen.
     
    Mom: Darling, we’re here! Pick you up in ten for golf.
     
    Christ, I forgot about my mom. She’s here for her visit and I promised her nine holes before work.
    Cali’s expression narrows, her face flushed. She’s so angry. She has a right to her anger, but I never asked her ex to hit on me. It wasn’t my fault. I never wanted it.
    Maybe getting out of the house and cooling off is a good thing. I quickly reply to my mom that I’ll be ready and jam my phone in my bag. I stride into the bedroom and strip off my wet shorts.
    Cali follows and stands in the doorway, glaring.
    “I tried to tell you, Cali, but it was when you were happy with him. After you and Eric broke up, I told myself I’d be kicking you when you were down. I didn’t want to cause you more pain. I panicked and more time passed …”
    “What are you talking about?”
    I tear off my damp T-shirt and pull a clean one over my head. “Do you remember when I drove Eric to the store to pick up sunscreen while you were in the shower the first weekend in town?” She nods. “He came up behind me when we were there and wrapped his arms around my waist. He kissed my neck. I was still getting over the A-hole and not thinking clearly. It freaked me out. I worried you’d get the wrong idea and believe I led Eric on. You don’t know what it’s like.”
    I’m like the creeper magnet.
    “Are you kidding me? You’re seriously telling me guys lusting after you is a hardship that forces you to betray your best — fucking — friend. ”
    Tears fill my eyes and I blink them back. “That’s not what happened. That’s not what I’m saying.”
    “What are you saying?”
    I’ve ruined everything. Maybe Cali’s right and it is my fault. I’m the common denominator in all this—Cali’s ex, my mother’s groupies and their wandering hands.
    “He said he’d always been attracted to me—” Why does the truth sound so horrible? I should stop talking, but somehow my mouth won’t cooperate, as if I’ve been given a truth serum, the words spilling out like a faucet. “—that things were fizzling between you two and that you had basically become friends.”
    The expression on Cali’s face is dejected, betrayed. She drops her head into her hands. I grab the windowsill when what I really want is to wrap my arms around my best friend, but I don’t think she’d welcome that right now.
    My chest feels tight and achy. I was right to keep this from her. No one wants the truth, not even me. Every word out of my mouth makes things worse. I should leave.
    Cali looks up, pointedly. “What did you say to him?”
    “No! I said no! I never wanted that. He made me feel … dirty. I would never …”
    She turns away, her rejection so sharp I suck in my breath. After a moment, I walk up to her. “Cali, we need to talk, but I have to go or I’ll