Free Michael by Aaron Patterson Page B

what it is.”
    Michael nodded as if he understood what I was saying. “About all this, the fight, the killing, and you…I want to fix it, to make it better.”
    I wasn’t sure about any of that. Part of him honestly repulsed me when he acted like that. It was like when he just kept apologizing over and over. I just wanted him to get over it. “All right, dude,” I said, trying to change the mood a little bit. “Tell me something.”
    “Uh-oh.”
    “When did you know?”
    “Know what?”
    “That I was different; one of the—what do you call them?”
    “Them? The Immortals.” He paused for a moment, eyes on the spray of light made by the headlights as we drove along the twisty two-lane road. “I was suspicious when you fainted at football practice. On our date, I put it together. The kidnapping too…pretty much gave you away.” He smiled.
    I kept on. “And when did you decide to not kill me? To betray your father?”
    Michael sighed. “I thought I would be able to clear my head when I left. You know, when I disappeared?”
    “When Kreios let you go, you mean?”
    “Sure. Stanley was furious, though. He got me to tell him where you were…but when he left to go after you…I knew that I couldn’t allow him to do what he wanted to do anymore. I had to resist him. On some level I knew that it would require force…I knew that there would be consequences. I just never knew how deep all of it would go.”
    It was hard to hear him talk about it, but I needed to process. “Well, I’m…I’m sorry you had to kill him…”
    “He was dead already, really.” Michael’s eyes were narrow, piercing the darkness as it came at us over the hood, smacking the windshield, rushing around the doors and swirling into and through the wheels as we sped on through it. “The Bloodstone took over his mind. It will eat you from the inside out. It’s just too much. Too much power.”
    I reached out and found his hand. He interlaced his fingers with mine and everything felt right again. I could feel my pulse quicken with his heartbeat through his hand, as if we had the same heart.
    I thought about asking how many people he had killed before me. But I didn’t. I wasn’t ready for what he might say, I decided. I didn’t know if I would ever be ready to hear that. “This is all so much. I don’t understand even what I am. I mean, I have pieces of the puzzle. But so much is dark. Hidden somewhere. I don’t know where to look.”
    “Maybe it’s not important right now. I wish I had the answers. But I’m looking for my own answers too.” He was quiet for a moment. “Just remember that you’re special.” He squeezed my hand.
    “It’s funny. I always wanted that, looking back. Though I never would have admitted it. I would have said to anyone who asked me that I only wanted to be real, normal, find my own way to fit into the world. And now that I am special…different…there’s no going back. And that’s real clear. It feels like all I want is whatever I can’t have. I just feel so unsafe.”
    “I know exactly what you mean.”
    “Really?”
    “Totally,” he said.
    “I guess I can see that. I mean, see how you could. You’ve been through a lot. We both have. You probably more than me.”
    He was silent for a moment. “I know sometimes life makes you break your word. No one can say what they will or won’t do. Not with any guarantees.” He was silent again for a moment. “If I know anything, I know that most of the crap we’ve been fed is a total lie. You know, like you were talking about.”
    “Like what? I bet you really want to tell me.” I smiled at him. I could tell he was getting riled up, that side of his personality I had seen so briefly on our first date.
    “Well…okay, I know you well enough to know that you’ll appreciate this. Let’s just look at our cultural obsession with fame. That whole American Idol thing. I mean, the minute anyone shows the slightest talent for singing, and this is