Free Bloodrose by Andrea Cremer Page B

still smiling. “You don’t want to.”
    There was no hint of fear or doubt in his voice, only a gleam in his eyes that made them vibrant. I could see the challenge there. The wolf inside me snarled at the provocation from another alpha.
    It wasn’t a matter of making a choice. Pure instinct drove me forward. I was standing over him, pressing my palms down on either side of him, forcing him to lie back. My lips curled, bearing sharpening canines. I drew a deep breath, wondering if he was afraid of me. But fear’s sharp tang didn’t linger in the air. Only Shay’s scent, thunderclouds crackling with lightning, swirled around me, mixing with the smoky amber of our mutual desire.
    “This isn’t choosing,” I said, my words husky. Balance. I’m supposed to keep balance. Damn. It was going to be much, much harder than I’d realized. I wanted him so much.
    Even as I battled against my passion, struggling to remember that I wasn’t allowed to be here—in Shay’s room, on his bed—my resolve evaporated. He was simply too close, his skin too warm and inviting. And I loved him. The wolf within me howled for a mate. The pull of his body was magnetic; I couldn’t turn away.
    “Isn’t it?” Shay smiled. “What is it, then?”
    “A lapse in judgment,” I said, though it didn’t sound convincing.
    “Works for me.” Shay’s canines were sharp. His arms wrapped around me, pulling me down onto the bed. He rolled over, pinning me beneath him.
    “I love you,” he murmured before he kissed me. I returned his kiss, aching to be closer to him.
    “I know you don’t need me, Cal,” he said, moving his lips along my throat. “That’s why I love you. But I want you to know I belong beside you, with you. I may not have been the one chosen for you, but I want to be your mate. Your alpha.”
    His words jolted through me, an electric current of desire. He understood so much about who I was. What I wanted. How I lived and loved. Heat swirled through my limbs. I slid my hands beneath his shirt, running my fingers over the muscles of his back. He pulled his shirt over his head. My heart stuttered at the sight of his carved torso giving way to the cut of his hips, the rest of his body only covered by drawstring pajama pants. In the next moment I was pushing those down too.
    As the rest of my clothes peeled away, I buried lingering doubts. One night of bending my self-imposed rules to reassure Shay couldn’t hurt. Could it?
    Whatever the consequences, as Shay’s hands and lips moved over my body, I knew how foolish my question was. I hadn’t slipped into Shay’s room late at night to rid him of doubts about my feelings. I was here for myself.
    I twined my fingers in his hair, bringing his face close to mine. “I love you, Shay,” I said. “Always.”

SIX

    THERE’S A REASON they call it the morning after. I woke up before dawn with my heart slamming against my ribs. Gray light filtered through the room. Clouds had rolled in overnight, leaving the sky above flat, the color of slate.
    As I hurried to pull on my clothes and get myself out of Shay’s room before he woke up, I silently berated myself. Not only did I feel like a total bitch for leaving Shay alone not once, but twice, I also felt the potential consequences of my decision to stay with him last night piling up on my shoulders like heavy stones.
    Questions darted in and out of my mind as I grabbed clean clothes from my room and rushed to shower. Would Ren know? Would Shay gloat and provoke a fight? Innumerable worst-case scenarios played out as I headed straight to the bath, all of them ending with Shay, Ren, or me bleeding and the alliance destroyed. Right now facing bear-shaped Guardians or even a wraith had more appeal than dealing with fallout from my love life. As I scrubbed my skin well past exfoliation, regret lingered, following me like a shadow. I didn’t want to pretend that last night with Shay hadn’t happened. Every kiss, every caress I shared with