Free Glow by Anya Monroe Page A

herbs and identifying flowers.
    Those skills aren’t special. They aren’t traits that would define me, not to anyone that mattered. They are just tiny pieces of a person who still doesn’t know who she is.
    I don’t want to be outside at a campfire, drinking stolen booze, watching as Junie and Duke kiss by the fire, or Colton emcees a game of truth or dare. I don’t want to listen to tales of auras being read or lines traced on palms.
    I came back to the compound to make peace with my past, like the symbolic burning of the tree. I have to let the parts of myself from before become like dust, otherwise I’ll never be the person Lukas needs me to be. The person, according to a book Junie found, I’m destined to be.
    Walking down the small hallway toward the study, a small voice whispers to me. I thought the younger girls were sleeping, but Timid calls out to me.
    I slip in the bedroom where Timid and Hana are supposed to be sleeping. Timid takes my hand and I crawl into bed with the girls, lying down on top of the covers. I drape my bright arm across their bodies and Timid repositions herself. Hana sleeps soundly, her heavy breathing lulling the room. The room glows with me here and I wonder, not for the first time, how Lukas can lower his light. Years of practice I guess.
    “I’m glad we’re going back, Lucy. It’s just what Councilman Integrity wanted me to do. Bring you back. And I am doing my job. He’ll be so proud of me.” Her voice is so soft, still so full of innocence and I try to think of what Junie would say right now. She’d offer comfort, not start an argument. But I can’t sit by and not speak my truth.
    “I’m glad I can do that for you, Timid.” I draw in my breath, not wanting to say what I know I must. “You mustn’t keep things from people just because a man tells you to. Even if it’s a Councilman. You need to follow your heart and never hold back.” I speak the words to myself as much as her.
    And I feel the struggle inside as tears fall, not only because I’m doing what Lukas wants, but also because I feel trapped, stuck. I’m caught in a life I never wanted. I want my destiny to be the one I make, not the one thrust upon me.
    And I’m ashamed that I don’t want to be the person I was made to be. Ashamed I want to be another girl, the one who rises with the sun. Rises with the ashes. The one who can start all over.

25.
     
    Lukas
     
    I sit on a log next to one of the dozens of fires I started for the people who just arrived. Gathering firewood in the dark was too much of an undertaking, and although I could have supplied energy for their headlights, I opted instead to create little fires for each group huddled, seeking warmth and a way to heat the food they’d packed.
    This is new for me. In every possible way, I feel alive and in control of my destiny. I’m not spending my night strapped to a chair, letting my energy drain until a Councilman’s heavy hand tells me to stop. Instead, I’m sending my light as far as it can go, and it feels as though I’m getting back every ounce I pour out. Everyone is happy and animated, the smiles on their faces reflecting the impact of my light.
    I wander from campsite to campsite, listening to my new friends, new followers of the Light, as they trade stories of their pasts, all horribly tragic, the wounds raw. I listen as they gossip about who’s with whom, and I watch as pairs wander off in the darkness, hands held, grasping for the night to never end.
    “You doing okay, Nobleman?” Basil walks over to me, with a funny look in her eye.
    “Never better. I feel invigorated. I’ve never had friends, you know that? I’ve always been alone, until Lucy. I’ve finally found a place I belong.”
    “You mean, belong at The Light, right?” she asks, pulling her arms around her chest, blocking the cold night air.
    “Let me help.” I press my hand to her, letting my touch fill her with warmth. Her body immediately relaxes as the chill