Free Friends Without Benefits (Knitting in the City) by Penny Reid Page B

going to tell me and you’re going to describe every intimate detail—do they shave his chest? Because, on the show, he has no hair on his chest and I think they must because he is Italian. And what about his—”
    “Stop . Please stop.” I shook my head, still in my hands, and started to laugh. The sound was slightly frantic.
    Sandra pulled my palms from my face and waited until I met her eyes . “Why are you so mortified about this? He is h-o-t hot. I would’ve thought you’d get T-shirts made that said ‘Yeah, I hit that.’”
    “Oh Sandra.” I smile-frowned . “It’s so complicated.”
    “Um, no it’s not. It’s simple really. Nico Moretti, or Manganiello or whatever, still has the leg humpies for you—”
    I started laughing and shaking my head again. “No, it’s not like that. He—he’s—”
    “No, girl, it is like that. It’s exactly like that. I thought he was going to grab you by the hair and drag you away caveman style. Instead he man-handled you, just a little, and it was hot. I bet if we go to his table he’ll—”
    “No, we can’t do that. You don’t understand. Nico was Garrett’s best friend.”
    Sandra’s mouth snapped shut , and she blinked at me. “Wait, what?”
    I couldn’t believe this person was me. I was a grown woman, standing in a shower stall, whispering about high school drama. I didn’t even do this when I was in high school.
    I stepped back, leaned against the wall; let my head fall backward, rest on the tile; “Garrett and Nico were best friends.”
    “And you were  what?” Sandra lifted her eyebrows. “And you were the girl that came between them?”
    “No. Not at all. Nico and I—we used to play together when we were kids, like, all the time. Our mothers were best friends and he would tease me constantly . But then my mom died the same year Garrett moved to town. The next year, by the time Garrett and Nico became friends, Nico hated me and I didn’t like him much either. He started all kinds of rumors about me when I was in middle school—dumb, kid stuff. He used to follow me down the hall whispering Skinny Finney —his nickname for me, by the way, which ended up being adopted by everyone.”
    “How did Garrett feel about thi s, about Nico’s treatment of you?”
    “ Garrett would stand up for me. Sometimes they’d go weeks without talking to each other. Eventually, Nico would apologize, in front of Garrett. I knew it was false, for show. But I didn’t want to be the reason Garrett and Nico fought. I always felt bad about it, like it was my fault.”
    “It wasn’t your fault.”
    “I know, but I was an adolescent and I couldn’t think of what to do, I didn’t know how to process it, how to not overreact. Whenever we were in the same room together it was like—I mean—we were always at each other’s throats. I was shy with most people, but, with Nico, I gave as good as he did. I was really mean. He was really mean. I couldn’t stand him.”
    “Hmm .” Sandra tilted her head to the side, studying me. “You couldn’t stand him?”
    I looked up at the ceiling without really seeing it. What I saw instead was Nico next to Garrett’s bed, the two of them playing their guitars. “That’s not entirely true. I cared about him, about Nico. Even after—” I lifted my hands and motioned to the air around us. “—just everything. I mean, we grew up together. When we were kids it wasn’t all bad. Sure, there was lots of teasing, but there were good times too, you know? And I thought he cared about me, as a friend, but the older we got the worse he became.”
    “You think he didn’t care about you.” It was a statement.
    I nodded my confirmation. “How could he? How could he possibly care about me and be so awful?”
    “His treatment of you must have hurt.”
    “It did.” I glared at her, didn’t particularly like the fact that she was right, that it was still painful. I was a twenty-six-year-old adult whose feelings continued to be