Free Found (Lost and Found #2, New Adult Romance) (Lost & Found) by Nadia Simonenko Page A

can’t breathe to answer him, though. He clenches his hand tightly around my throat as he drags me toward the laundry room, and every time I try to loosen his grip, he slaps me again. My ears ring painfully as he hits me again and again, and the laundry room starts to spin.
    Something strange happens and it suddenly feels as if the room is falling away around me. I can hear myself crying, but it’s like I’m not there anymore. I’m watching myself from somewhere outside now, peacefully detached from everything.
    That’s not me he’s hurting—just a little boy that looks like me.
    This happens sometimes when Dad’s angry at me and I kind of like it. I’m safe and numb out here.
    He shoves my head into the laundry room sink and freezing-cold water starts pouring down on top of me. Suddenly, I’m back inside my body again as water fills the sink and pours into my mouth. I cough and sputter, flailing desperately as he holds my head beneath the water. He’s still screaming unintelligibly, still hitting me the whole time I’m choking. My heart races uncontrollably as I try to break free from him, but I can’t get away. I’m going to drown!
    “Todd!” screams my mother from somewhere behind me. “Stop it! What’s wrong with you?”
    His grip on my shoulders loosens as Mom tries to drag him off me and then suddenly I’m falling. I collapse on the floor and lay limply on the cold tiles as my parents yell at each other above me. Maybe if I close my eyes and wait, this will all go away. I curl up in a ball next to the dryer and squeeze my eyes shut as tightly as I can. I can’t stop shaking.
    “I should have killed you the day you were born,” he hisses from somewhere high above me.
    “I’m sorry,” I whimper, not daring to open my eyes. “I’m sorry I got dirty.”
    The pencil snaps between my teeth and suddenly I’m back in the library. I’m still humiliated that I can’t break that horrible chewing habit, but today I’m thankful for it. That’s twice this semester that it’s yanked me out of a nightmare.
    I don’t know why the news of him dying hurts so much, but I’m certain of one thing: I’m glad he’s dead. I’m so fucking glad he’s dead.
    I grab my backpack and start rummaging. Where’d my phone go? I need to tell Maria what happened, and more importantly, I need to apologize to her. I need to fix the terrible mistake I made.
    There is nothing in the world more urgent to me, right now, than to undo that horrible mistake.
    One ring... two rings... voice mail.
    I hang up and dial again. This time, my call goes straight to her voice mail. She shut her phone off rather than talk to me, and I can’t say I blame her. If she’d treated me as badly as I just treated her, I’d be upset too.
    Time for the back-up plan: a text message.
    O: I’m the biggest asshole ever. Sorry. Plz call me.
    My back-up plan is even worse than my primary ones. A real man would get off his worthless butt, go find her and apologize. He might even bring roses or something. I’m too big a wimp to do that. No, I’ll just sit right here and mope while I hide in the library. Look how well that’s worked over the years.
    I put my phone away, sigh and stare down at the textbook again. The words still aren’t making sense to me. Just like the day I lost Samantha, I’m hiding away from what’s hurting me and pretending that it doesn’t matter, like if pretend it’s not there for long enough, it’ll go away.
    My worst fear is dead, though, so why am I still so scared?
    I check my phone again—no answer from Maria in the last forty-five seconds. No big surprise there. I know exactly whom I need to talk to if I ever want to figure out why I’m scared, and I just drove her away.

Wednesday, March 27 – 5:15 PM
    Maria

    I keep waiting for the tears to come the entire way home but they never do. I figured that Owen’s rejection would have settled in by now—that my brain would finally process what happened and get the