Free Aftermath by Cara Dee Page B

Another attack was on its way. "Nothing we can—nothing we can do. Nothing." Deserting his finger tapping, he fisted his hair and kept rocking.
    Unbeknownst to him, Austin was worried sick. This kind of behavior wasn’t…normal. "Hey, stop that." He tried to loosen Cam's hold on his dark, nearly black, hair. "Talk to me."
    Cam responded as if Austin's request had been a command he had to obey, and he spoke words without really knowing what he was talking about. "My sister-in-law used to tell me that any disorder on the spectrum gives a person character. It's the shit that usually comes with Asperger's or whatever that makes it a challenge." Cam nodded. "Naïve. My sister-in-law was naïve. Still is, I guess. 'Cause she still says it sometimes. But I haven't seen her in…um, I don’t know. I don’t fucking know." He groaned.
    Austin was speechless after Cam's verbal vomit, and he knew too little about whatever disorder he'd mentioned to answer. But he was willing to bet there were more fitting words for Cam's sister-in-law. Perhaps protective, accepting, and loyal. Regardless, Austin had a feeling the woman had been the opposite of uncaring when those words had been spoken. He didn’t say that, though.
    Instead he went with, "Asperg—uh, what was it?"
    Cam sucked in a breath, slowly releasing his hair. "Asperger syndrome." He nodded again. "I used to say it was a lesser stupid than autism, but my mom whacked me on the head for saying that. She—she—" he swallowed dryly and tried to find his words "—she said I was stupid if I spoke stupid. She told me it made me come off as an idiot if I said shit that wasn’t true."
    Austin didn’t know a lot about autism, either, but he had at least heard of that disorder. Was Asperger's like that, then? "Uh." He cleared his throat, feeling the need to tread carefully. "Does this Asperger syndrome cause your breathing problem?"
    "No." Cam shook his head, slowing his rocking. "No. That’s my anxiety disorder. It's what fucks me up." He tapped his temple. "I gotta be in control of my life. If I lose control, I panic. I don’t fucking like it."
    Jesus Christ, Austin thought. They were certainly not in control of their lives here.
    "I'm not a fucking retard," Cam spat out. "Before this, I hadn't had an attack in years. I don't like small spaces, I can't handle many people at the same time, I'm antisocial, I gotta have routines…but I ain't dumb." Cam's glare dared Austin to defy his words.
    "Did I say you were dumb?" Austin arched a brow.
    "I'm highly functioning." Cam went on as if Austin hadn't said a word. "I was behind when I was a kid, but that’s fucking it. So what if I didn’t speak 'til I was four?" He scowled at the floor. "And so what if I don’t like people?"
    Austin didn’t reply. Not because he agreed or disagreed, but because he didn’t know what to say.
    "Don’t treat me any different just 'cause you know now," Cam finished in a mutter.
    "I won't," Austin responded quietly, not sure he meant it.
    *
    When Cam began to hyperventilate, he called Landon instead. He was sick of Austin seeing him this way.
     

Chapter 8
    On Friday, Austin found himself watching the clock as they ate an early dinner.
    Jade hadn't liked the idea of Austin going to a bar after his session with Angelo a few days ago, and she had flat out refused to let him skip dinner. So, they'd come to a compromise. He could go out today when Jade had plans to take Riley to visit her parents in Delano. They were spending the weekend, too, so that was that.
    "All done!" Riley declared and pushed the plate away from her. "Can I watch some TV before we go?"
    "Of course," Austin said as Jade said, "No."
    Riley scrunched her nose and watched her parents as they stared at each other.
    "We eat together," Jade insisted. "It's how it's always been."
    Austin refused to cave, though. While keeping his gaze fixed on Jade, he told Riley, "You're excused, baby girl. Just put your plate in the dishwasher