Free Maybe This Time by Chantal Fernando Page B

making me feel guilty. My dad is pretty scary looking.
Tall, built, bearded and tattooed. But he's a real softy,
especially with me. He’s never yelled at me or anything like that,
although from what I’ve been told, it’s only me he treats like
that. I think it’s from the guilt of never being there for me.
    “Yeah, and
when I do show up you don’t even want one on one time with me,
instead you have your girl here who I don’t even like,” I say in
all honesty. I emphasise the girl part. When my dad looks shocked,
I sigh dramatically.
    How can he be
so obtuse?
    “Tina, leave
me alone with my daughter,” he says, his tone picking up strength
when he addresses her.
    “You can’t be
serious,” she whines, glaring at me.
    “Now,” he says
calmly, and she stands up to leave, making a big show of it. When
she finally goes into the bedroom, slamming the door behind her, he
looks straight at me, his gaze softening.
    I feel like he
is looking right through me right now.
    “I knew you
weren’t fond of her, I thought it was just because of her age,” he
says.
    “She’s a
bitch. She thinks I’m going to come between the two of you,” I tell
him.
    “She said
that?” he growls, starting to look angry. I shrug, not wanting to
get into it.
    “That’s cos
she knows nothing is more important to me than you and Xander. I
know I haven’t always been there for you, but not because I didn’t
want to be. Your mother told me I could only see you once a year,
Summer. And I wasn’t exactly in the position to ask for full
custody. I didn’t want to take you away from her anyway. I didn’t
want to pull you from the life you knew. I wanted you with me,
trust me, but I didn’t want to be selfish. After all was said and
done, she was a good mother to you, so I took what I could. God, I
used to wait until your birthday so I could see you. See how much
you'd grown, how beautiful you were getting,” he says, his voice
wistful.
    “Really?” I
whisper, my voice breaking.
    “Of course,
Summer, you were my little girl. You are my little girl.
There's nothing I won’t do for you.”
    “She said you
didn’t care about me, you just left me to be with your new family,”
I say softly, my voice wavering. He slams his fist down on the
table, making me jump.
    “She lied,
Summer,” he growls, his face contorting in anger.
    I exhale
deeply, leaning my chin on my palm. “You cheated on her.”
    Jack
noticeably flinches. “I did. My relationship with her wasn’t
working, but it had nothing to do with you. You were the only
reason I stayed with her. You were my little princess, Summer, and
she used you as a weapon against me.”
    “She told me
the best thing a father can do for his daughter was love her
mother,” I say, my tone now emotionless. When I see a tear drop
down my father’s cheek, my own tears flow.
    “I messed up,
but I never stopped loving you, Summer.” I get up from my chair and
walk over to him, throwing my arms around him and burying my face
in his neck. I cry as he keeps apologizing over and over again,
making me cry further.
    “I hate seeing
you cry,” he says gruffly, wiping my tears with his thumb.
    “I’m
sorry.”
    “Don’t be
sorry, baby girl. I want you in my life, I want to show you how
much I love you. You make an old man proud.”
    “I want that,
too,” I admit. “And you’re not that old.”
    He kisses me
on my cheek.
    “I’ve missed
out on so much. Your mother sent me pictures and kept me updated,
but I missed out on being there for you. I regret that we can’t get
that time back, but we have now. You’ve made me so happy by coming
here, Summer.”
    When the sobs
subside, my father and I talk, for what feels like the first time.
We listen to each other, and we get to know each other.
    And it’s
perfect.
    “Xander tells
me you have eyes for Reid.” He doesn't look too happy about it.
    “I had eyes
for Reid.” My heart hurts at the mere mention of him.
    “He’s a
complicated