Free Bargaining with the Bride by Allison Gatta Page A

hiding place."
    "I figured it would be so easy to find, burglars wouldn't bother to look there."
    "Sound logic," his voice dripped with sarcasm as he slid the eggs onto a plate and moved to set them on the table.
    “Listen, I’m going to ignore the blaring sound of your judgment if you’ll explain why all of your stuff is here and also,” she pointed out the window. “What teen wolf out there is doing here.”
    “That’s my pug, Tesla, and all my stuff is here. Well, really, it’s only some of my stuff, but it’s all here because I’m going to live here until the wedding.”
    Her mouth went dry, “You’re what now?”

6
    “ I did a lot of thinking , and the best option at hand is to immerse ourselves in the culture of the other person. You know, like Jane Goodall,” he said.
    “Are you calling me a monkey?”
    “She studied gorillas, but that aside, I’m not saying it’s the perfect metaphor. It’s simply a science project.”
    Spluttering sounds gurgled from her mouth, but she had no words. Instead, she plopped into the kitchen chair directly behind her and waited for Garret to set a plate in front of her. There were no other options than to quietly accept that this chaos was her life now, even if it felt like there had to be some kind of reality TV crew hiding in her bathroom. Like she was the pilot episode for Punk’d: Nobodies Addition .
    “It’s really the only way to account for mannerisms and intimacies that we otherwise wouldn’t know about each other. Things you wouldn’t think to mention to the other person that could conceivably be mentioned at such an intimate affair. Don’t you think?” He slid the bacon out of the oven, his tone too rational to acknowledge the lunacy of his words.
    “Um, I guess,” she stuffed a biscuit into her mouth. So now he wanted unlimited opportunities to catch her sneaking ice cream at two AM in nothing but her unmentionables? She wasn’t trying to send out invites to that nightly shame party. No thanks.
    And even if he was to live with her, just for the next month, did she need to face her fears on a daily basis just to get someone to pretend to be her husband?
    Probably, but it couldn’t hurt to ask.
    “And, um, what about Tesla? He needs to be a part of this? My family knows how I feel about dogs, they won’t buy it.”
    “That is a hitch I hadn’t expected. Why didn’t you mention this fear on the questionnaire I emailed you?”
    “Questionnaire?” She raised her eyebrows and he promptly averted his gaze.
    “It doesn’t matter. The point is, it’s an unavoidable complication. I can’t leave him alone at my house, and I’m not really comfortable with strangers in my home.”
    “ You’re uncomfortable with strangers in your home?”
    Apparently the humor of the situation was lost on him. He just nodded and slid into the seat next to her, shoveling eggs, bacon, and biscuits onto his plate and looking contemplative. It was almost unnerving, how easy all of this seemed to him. Like he thought this was an in and out kind of thing.
    " Seriously? " She tried to bate him again, but his only response was to crunch into a crisp slice of bacon and nod again, saying between chews.
    "It's creepy."
    "Like, almost as creepy as finding your boss in your kitchen while you’re, um, indecent?" She pulled her tank top and his gaze followed her, searing through the thin fabric until she felt distinctly naked. After the way he’d kissed her last night, though, he might have made her feel naked with all of her winter sweaters piled on top of her.
    And what was with the kiss? That was the real question, wasn’t it? More so than all this talk of moving in or studying her. She had to know how her felt. Or if being around her made him feel even half as exposed as she felt.
    She cleared her throat, trying her best to sort through the mountains of questions he’d unleashed. "Thanks and everything. For the breakfast. But this is still pretty bizarre. Imagine if I