like such a snob for even continuing. “Mama, I loved learning. I love reading and writing. I love books that teach me new things. I want to discuss those things with others, but this isn’t exactly the place to find someone of a like mind.”
“Oh, sweetheart, I completely understand.”
“Do you really? Because I’m not sure I do. I feel horrible for it. It sounds like I think myself better than others, but that’s not it at all.”
“Of course not,” her mother agreed. “Just because you have one interest and someone else has another doesn’t mean either one of you is better. Zed Perkins knows how to run a sawmill. Jack knows how to engineer a train. You can’t drive a train. Does that make Jack better than you – worse than you?”
Deborah shook her head. “But I’m afraid that when it comes to courting, it will be a problem. Not that I have time for that.” She ignored her mother’s frown. “Mama, when Sam suggested a walk all I could think about was how I could never marry someone like him. I know that’s horrible, and I’m sorry.” She looked at her mother in desperation. “Please don’t hate me, but I’m not sure I could fall in love with a man who didn’t have an education.”
Her mother reached out to pat her cheek. “Darling, when the right man comes along all of these things will fall into place. Don’t fret over it. No one is asking you to marry Sam. The important thing to keep in mind is whether or not you’re like-minded when it comes to God. Being unequally yoked can certainly pertain to other things, but spiritually, it is a never-ending battle that no married couple should have to endure. You need a man who first and foremost loves God.”
“A man who loves God and is intelligent,” Deborah said. “Of course, he should be thoughtful and kind, as well.”
Her mother laughed. “And it wouldn’t hurt if he was handsome, too. Maybe even well off.”
Deborah grinned. “Well, if we’re making a list, we might as well add it all.”
Mother gave her a hug and released her. “I’m glad you’re home. I missed your sense of humor and open frankness. Just don’t fret over what you can’t change. Folks here are just glad to be working and have a roof over their heads. Reading and writing isn’t something they miss.”
“Maybe not, but maybe that’s only because they never had it to begin with,” Deborah replied. “They don’t know what they’re missing.”
Her mother nodded. “Sometimes that’s the best way to get by. I find it a lot easier to be content when I’m not pondering the things I miss.”
“Like Papa?”
“Yes,” her mother said with a sigh. “He was my best friend, and it’s hard to lose that. I know he’s in a better place, but sometimes I’m lonely.”
Deborah didn’t know what to say. She longed to be able to say something that would give her mother just the right sense of assurance, but truth be told, Deborah felt completely unable to help. What did she know of losing a mate – a best friend of nearly thirty years?
Finally she put her arm around her mother’s shoulders and simply held her close. Sometimes, words simply had no power to help.
C HAPTER 7
J ULY 1885
The weeks of June slipped into July, and as the heat grew more intense, Deborah’s efforts to set up the Vandermark Logging office did, too. She had decided the best way to get organized was to actually have an office. In the past, Uncle Arjan had just carried a ledger around with him to the logging site and then back to his small cabin just a few yards behind the main house. Now, however, Deborah believed the size of their organization merited a place for everything and everything in its place.
There was a sewing room on the ground floor of the Vandermark house that would work quite well. With her mother’s enthusiastic encouragement, Deborah arranged for her brothers to move the sewing things upstairs to the storage room, where she and Lizzie could fix it up properly.