Free Elemental by Emily White Page A

door slid closed, and the
sudden quiet in the room became oppressive.
    Someone really didn’t want me to have a
life—of that I was very sure. Malik had tried to act like the
change in our circumstances hadn’t bothered him, but I could detect
the panic seething underneath. Not worry? Impossible.
    I crumpled to the floor and let my cheek
rest against the cold metal. It felt soothing against my hot,
clammy skin—familiar. I groaned. The thought that a cold, metal
floor should comfort me with its familiarity absolutely revolted
me. Never in my wildest imaginings had I thought I would look back
at any part of my time on Sho’ful with longing.
    Meir’s broad arms wrapped around me as he
lifted me up and carried me back to my cot. My body draped like
some kind of rag doll. I wanted to tell him to put me down so that
I could walk, but I couldn’t find my voice. He rested me on my cot
and backed away to sit on his own.
    Time passed steadily, though I don’t know
how. It was hard to think past my own frozen body, hard to imagine
that the universe hadn’t frozen with me. But pass it did, and
eventually my mind began to thaw. I was able to think again. I
forced myself to think of the impossible—the undoable.
    Though I had never known the exact plan for
my escape, it had seemed pretty clear to me that the original
thought had been to just get me to Soltak. Once there, a change of
clothes would have been my biggest problem, but easily handled.
Now, it was obvious this Delsa-Prime guy wasn’t just going to let
some Mamood slave escape. Malik was no longer the ranking officer
aboard this ship.
    That left me with few options. And one of
them seemed the only realistic one: I was going to have to turn
myself in. The game had gone on long enough and I was a fool to
think Manoo would just let me go. I was Shadra—his enemy. Manoo
didn’t give
    someone that title unless he really meant
it.
    A tear slid down my cheek. Could I do this
to Meir? I didn’t care for myself. My life had ceased a long time
ago. It was never right of me to try to reanimate what was already
dead. And as time continued to pass, victims would fall at my feet.
First Meir, now Malik, and I guessed even Pallaton would suffer for
what I’d done. I was the bringer of death, indeed. Better to end it
now before the whole universe came crashing down.
    I snickered. So much for being a nobody.
    I just didn’t know how to go about doing it.
If I gave Meir and Malik some warning so they could escape, they
would try to stop me. Well, at least Meir would. Malik I still
wasn’t entirely sure about. His honor seemed important to him, but
my declaration of self-sacrifice might very well release him from
any sense of duty. After all, I would be the one making the
choice, not him.
    That gave me an idea. Perhaps I could confide in Malik. I would have to get him alone before they did
anything stupid to try to get me away. He could run off with Meir,
concocting some story about how they had to go on ahead, and then I
could turn myself in to the Delsa-Prime. Meir and Malik would be
safe and no one else would get hurt. I knew Meir would be hurt when
he found out. I couldn’t deny the bond that had formed between us.
He was every bit my father now, and it tore at my heart to think of
crushing him that way. I had to be strong for him, though. It would
be far worse if we stayed together. I wouldn’t allow myself to
think about just how bad it could get.
    I let the tears pour down my cheeks and soak
the hard fabric of my cot until I had nothing left. There was no
going back now. Though it hurt every tissue in my body to think
about leaving him, I knew I could be strong—for him.
    Freedom.
    The thought no longer brought hope, but a
wallowing hole of desolation. It was never to be mine. I had to
accept that now.
    I turned my body around to look at my
savior—memorizing every feature on his face. His soft, black eyes
were closed, but I studied the creases along his face. There