Free Songs for the Missing by Stewart O’Nan Page B

the flyer to every TV and radio station and newspaper from Erie to Cleveland. Within minutes the Star-Beacon called. As she answered their questions—“Tell me a little bit about Kim as a person”—she wondered if Ed would be angry with her when he got back.
    He wasn’t. He was still angry with the detective. He’d finally gotten through to Perry and discovered, after all this time, that Perry himself had actually stopped Kim for speeding yesterday around two o’clock and written her a warning. Fran didn’t know what to make of this clue, if that’s what it was.
    “You’d think they’d check those records first,” she said.
    “You’d think. He said she seemed fine, just a little nervous, which is normal since it’s the first time she’s been stopped, as far as I know. Anyway, we talked. He said he’d do what he could.”
    “What does that mean?”
    “He’s the sheriff,” Ed said. “It’s his department.”
    “He’s got to follow the rules like everyone else.”
    “I’d say this is more of a judgment call.”
    “So we should be hopeful.”
    “I think so.”
    They’d retreated upstairs to their room for privacy, leaving Connie in charge, and for a moment, holding him, she could believe they were making progress.
    He sweated when he was nervous, and the bill of his Sea Wolves cap was soaked through. He peeled off his T-shirt, swabbing his armpits with it, then reapplied deodorant before tugging on a new one.
    “Give me the hat, I’ll wash it.”
    “No,” he said, “it’s lucky.”
    He sat on a corner of the bed, trading his sneakers for his seldom-used hiking boots. He was taking J.P. and a team of volunteers to search along the river. Technically it was the last place she was seen, and though Fran doubted she’d go back there, she wanted to stay positive for him.
    “Did you get lunch? Giant Eagle sent stuff over.”
    “I’m not hungry. D’you get something?”
    “I tried,” she said.
    “What about Lindsay?”
    “I took her a sandwich. I wish she’d come out of there. I’ve got tons of things she can do.”
    Ed thought Lindsay’s reaction made perfect sense, but he also knew this cue was nonnegotiable. Fran rarely asked for help with the girls. The house was overrun, and he’d been gone for more than an hour, and now he was taking off again. It didn’t matter that his mind was miles away. In the basic emotional math of their marriage, he owed her.
    He waited for her to go downstairs before knocking on Lindsay’s door.
    She was reading with a half-eaten sandwich in her lap, and didn’t look up. Cooper sniffed at the paper plate. She shooed him with a backhand.
    “How’s it going?” he asked.
    “I’m ten pages from the end.” It was Julius Caesar , part of her summer reading.
    “It’s a little crazy down there.”
    “I know, I can hear it.” She saved her place with a finger and gave him her full attention.
    “When you’re done your mom could use a hand.”
    “Okay,” she said, and he thought it was too easy, as if she was just agreeing to get rid of him.
    “I know everyone’s worried about Kim. Your mother and I are worried about you.”
    “Why?”
    “If you were missing, do you think Kim would just be sitting in her room?”
    “No—”
    “I’m sorry.”
    “—she’d be out rescuing me, but I can’t because I can’t do anything. I can’t drive, I can’t even answer the phone.”
    “I don’t know what driving has to do with anything. We all need each other right now, so finish your book, then come down and help—please. Okay?”
    “Can I go with you?”
    Out of habit he was going to tell her to ask her mother, because the answer was no. He wouldn’t risk both of them. “I’d really rather you didn’t.”
    “What does Mom want me to do?”
    “You’ll have to ask her.”
    “Fine,” she said with a sigh. “I’ll be down.”
    “Thank you,” he said, but when he closed her door he thought he’d only made things worse.
    On the porch Fran