Free Deadly Little Lessons by Laurie Faria Stolarz Page A

front of the cell, angling my body so that I can stick my face into the hole. His lantern is still on the ground. It lights up the powdery dirt floor. The rest of the room appears as usual: concrete walls, wooden door, a pile of burlap bags in the corner.
    He’s whistling now. My words mean nothing. I watch as he picks up the lantern. He walks out of my field of vision and then I hear the sound of the door pulled shut.

F AST-FORWARD TWO FULL WEEKS . I’ve been officially accepted into the summer program at Sumner College, and I couldn’t be more elated.
    “I’m hoping that some time away will give me clarity and perspective,” I tell Kimmie and Wes.
    It’s late afternoon, and we’re sitting at the ice-cream counter at Brain Freeze, sharing a double-fudge peanut-butter barrel with extra whipped cream and chocolate syrup.
    “Okay, but if you come back as annoyingly evolved as your mom, I’m seriously going to have to beat some misery into you,” Wes says. “When I picked you up, she placed a crystal on my forehead and told me that my third eye was clogged.”
    “Don’t mind her; she’s all about chakra cleansing these days. It’s almost like she’s glad that I caught her in a lie, because it’s given her an opportunity to become a better person.”
    “Sickening,” he says.
    “I know.” I take a giant bite of ice cream.
    “And how is Adam handling the news of your departure?” Kimmie asks.
    “Okay, so I haven’t exactly told him yet. We’ve only been out once since I got the green light from admissions, but we were so busy talking about my parental funkdom that by the time I was going to tell him, things somehow segued to an incident in third grade when he split his pants open…and something about a package of peanut butter. I was only half listening, which I know is all my fault, but he totally took it personally, even when I apologized, and then our night was over.”
    “Torn pants and peanut butter… It doesn’t get any more mortifying than that.” Wes shudders.
    “Oh, really?” Kimmie raises an eyebrow. “Need I remind you of freshman year, Halloween dance, Wesley the Oscar Mayer wiener?”
    “Need not,” he says, unwilling to walk down memory lane.
    “I’m going to tell Adam about Sumner tonight. I’m heading over there after this—that is, if you’ll drive me…” I give Wes a pleading look.
    “Why should I, Miss I’m Deserting You Over Summer Break ? I mean, how am I supposed to survive swimsuit season with my dad without the two of you around? Did I mention he wants to feed me protein shakes, crack raw eggs into my mouth, and have me do weekly weigh-ins? He’s also installing chin-up bars on all the doors.”
    “Well, at least you’ll look pretty buff.” Kimmie pinches his puny bicep.
    He pauses in midlick (of syrup). “You do know that one can get salmonella poisoning from ingesting raw eggs, don’t you?”
    She rests her head against his shoulder. “I’m just trying to look on the bright side.”
    “Well, I have a better idea,” he says. “Let me come with you. I haven’t started the protein shakes yet, so I could probably still fit into your suitcase.…”
    “Get in line behind my little brother Nate. He’s already threatened to down a bottle of hot sauce if I leave.”
    “Because indigestion and stomach ulcers will keep you here?” Wes says, perking up.
    “More like because hot sauce tastes like poison to him, and so he assumes it has the same effect,” she says. “Now that Dad’s got his new apartment and Mom’s started working, Nate’s been clingier with me than ever. He doesn’t want to see me go. Seriously, it’s hard being ecstatic about your future when just about everyone around you feels dismal.”
    I slip my arm around Wes’s shoulder. “You can come visit me whenever you want,” I tell him. “I’ll only be a couple of hours away.”
    “Which leads me to my next question,” Kimmie begins. “How did you even pick Sumner? I mean,