Free The First Wife by Emily Barr Page B

that’s why. Got myself a bit of a problem with it. The first thing Mrs Jennings did was to get me off it. She got me some stuff that made me sick whenever I had it. It actually worked, after a few false starts. Anyway, enjoy your beer.’
    I grimaced. ‘It’s not very ladylike, is it? For me to sit here knocking back the beer while you’re on lemonade?’
    ‘Oh,’ said Al. ‘I had no idea we were concerned with being ladylike. Don’t be so stupid. Drink up.’
    I took a sip and made a face. ‘I only like white wine,’ I told him. ‘And that’s only by comparison with everything else.’
    ‘Now that is very ladylike.’
    ‘Did you have a good time with Boris and his children?’
    Al shook his head. ‘Yes, and no. Not really. It’s complicated.’
    I leaned back against the wall. ‘Go on then. Tell me about it. I would absolutely love to hear about someone else’s complications.’
    ‘Sure?’
    ‘Yep.’
    ‘OK. Prepare for a sorry tale.’
    I rearranged myself so I was sitting up straight, brushed my lap, and looked at him.
    ‘Prepared,’ I announced.
    ‘Right. I’ve been – well, I don’t want to shock you, but – I’ve been “seeing” Boris, as it were, for nearly a year now. It’s all snatched moments, not as romantic as one might like. We met online, he was married, he still is. I’m his bit on the side.’
    He paused, watching me carefully, gauging my reaction.
    ‘You’re. . . gay?’ I managed to say.
    ‘Yes, Lily. I’m . . . gay. So’s Boris. But he’s got his little ones and he doesn’t want them to hate him, which he seems to think would be inevitable if they knew. They’re two and four, just babies, and he can’t seem to . . .’
    Al straightened his back and pursed his lips, visibly pulling himself together. ‘Well, he can’t make the break. He says everyone’s better off if he carries on living the way he is, staying with his wife, being a dad to his kids, doing all the domestic stuff and meeting me when he can. For months I’ve been trying to get him to see that this isn’t fucking 1897. It’s not illegal any more. He’s making an idiot of his wife, because she has no idea, as far as I can tell. He could get out, give her a chance to meet someone who’s going to make her happy without creeping around the moment her back’s turned. It’s positively cool to have a gay dad these days, and he’s a great dad, so the children would be fine. He’s just not brave enough to do it.’
    He sighed. ‘I thought that yesterday, me meeting his kids – he brought them over to Falmouth to give his wife a bit of a break, that’s what he said to her – that might bring things a little closer. But he was so scared. Looking over his shoulder all the time. Couldn’t wait to leave.’
    ‘Oh, Al.’ I was so far out of my depth that I could not think of a single thing to say. This was impossible to react to. I tried to imagine Grandma’s reaction. ‘How very modern,’ I said, echoing her.
    Al roared with laughter. ‘Oh, Lily,’ he said. ‘I do love you. Thank you. Yes, how very modern indeed. Although I’ve no doubt it’s a problem that’s as old as the human race. It makes me want to reach for your beer, that’s for sure.’
    I pulled it away from his grasp. I seemed to have drunk almost half of it while I listened to his story.
    We had chips on the seashore for lunch, shivering as we did so, and walked from one beach to the next. We talked a bit about Boris, and a bit about me. It was easy, and I became fairly certain that I might have an actual friend.

    The train slowed down as it drew into Penmere. I stood in a queue for the door, along with about half the people in the carriage. The wind was wild as I stepped onto the platform and huddled into myself. I put my head down and started walking. It would take me ten minutes to get home from here, and by the time I got there I would be warm, if I walked fast enough.
    Everyone had their heads down, so it was not