Free The Forgotten: Aten's Last Queen by J. Lynn Else Page A

these people were happy to see me. I knew no one in the crowd. Yet they called our names and bowed down to us. It was frightening to see so many people yelling up at us.
    Father came prepared. Once we were all present, he opened up a sack full of small bread loaves. Everyone reached in and began throwing the bread to our citizens below. The cheering rose, and praises were sung to Pharaoh. Father loved these moments. The clamor of the people below all loving and worshipping his name caused his entire face to alight in bliss. He threw as much bread as he could hold at one time. It was an emotional experience for him. He would throw up his arms and sing the Hymn of Praise to Aten that he had written. He would sing mightily for all to hear. His voice was strong and could be heard over the combined roar below. Tears would flow down his cheeks, but at this height, the people could not see his salty flow of joy.
    Tadukhipa and my mother enjoyed these moments too. Mother was observant though. She tried to aim her throws to people who were not in the line of most of the tosses. While everyone else threw haphazardly, she watched and made sure every family received gifts. Merytaten stood next to her and did the same. She watched Mother intensely.
    At that moment, I was glad I was not in Merytaten’s place and surrounded by strangers all calling out for you every day, every hour, every minute, even every second. The crowd of people below us was enormous. To keep that many people happy every moment of the day was a frightening task. I could not imagine how Father could balance all their lives. I wondered if Meketaten desired still to be a great wife. Did this throng of people frighten or excite her? Her face looked happy. Of Merytaten’s expression, though, I could not read. A part of me felt sad for her. Would this be Merytaten’s choice if she had one?
    I reached into the bag and picked up a loaf with sesame seeds baked into it. It cracked a little as I squeezed it. I should not worry myself so. These were concerns for my sisters. Merytaten was observant and smart. She would make a great leader. It was in her blood.
    I breathed easy, content that would never have to be me, and flung a loaf to the hungry crowd below. I wondered what I looked like to those far below us.

 
    O My Heart,
Which I Had Upon Earth
1322 B.C .
    Hunting was ripe this season. It was our favorite time of the year to spend together. I could see the animals outside grazing, all plentiful and fat. Fishing was a favorite of mine as well as hunting birds. We had spent wonderful days together out on the Nile, the river rocking us gently like a mother holding a newborn baby. Being out on the river felt like a natural extension of life. It was a magical time where the wildlife would be tamed by our skills with a bow and throw stick.
    I had become quite skilled with the throw stick. To throw the weapon at just the right angle as to hit a bird in motion was a thrill like none other. I liked to think that my skills had bested my beloved’s, but he could have been only letting me have the moment. He was thoughtful to me in so many ways.
    There were throw sticks that would return back after a throw, their design more curved in nature, but these were not used for hunting. Instead, we liked to see who could throw them out the farthest over the Nile. Catching them on return proved difficult at first, but I was sure I would have it down by this season’s hunt. I had wanted to impress Tutankhamun out on our reed-spun raft. I had been practicing outside since his departure for war. I had been so excited to surprise him and for him to see my improvement. Yet here I found myself a year later, alone, with slices of wood resting in my hands inciting fantasies.
    I was probably just kidding myself. We had parted as strangers would. I had hoped when he returned, things would be like before. But with the death of our baby girl, it was as if our connection had fallen into Duat as well.