Free Slow Burn by Nicole Christie Page A

with me.  That means there has to be something out of the ordinary about me, right?  Something special.”
    Michelle lets her head fall into her hands.  “Lord help me, and the misguided teens of the world,” is what I think she mutters.   “When did being dysfunctional become sexy?  Yanni, the janitor at my office? He tells me he’s in love with me every day.  He leaves melted Hershey’s Kisses in my chair, and collects every strand of hair that has fallen out of my head at my desk for the past five years.  He made a doll out of it—don’t laugh, it’s not funny.  He’s fifty and balding—and he would kill for me.  Does that sound sexy to you?”
    “Oh, Michelle,” I say.  “That’s like comparing apples to…pig turd.  The question is— are you going to report him?”
    “Hell, no.  He makes me feel special.”
    We look at each other, then burst out laughing.  It’s exactly the kind of release I need.  Afterwards, I prop my chin on my hand, and smile at my aunt.  “Does Uncle Derek know about your secret admirer?”
    “Mmph.  Uh-huh.”  She fans her face after taking a big bite of her spicy chicken.  “Every time Derek visits me at the office, Yanni stands there and glares at him, and mumbles what I’m pretty sure are curses in his native tongue.  It’s like you say—kinda scary, but kinda hot.”
    “ So not hot.  Speaking of not hot, you have some sauce on your chin—left…down—you got it.  So, how’s Uncle Derek?  I haven’t seen him in a while.”
    Michelle wipes her mouth with a napkin, smearing her lipstick a little.  “Yeah, he’s been busy at work.  I haven’t seen too much of him either, truthfully.  I think he’s avoiding me, and the whole baby issue.   We’ve been fighting.  A lot.”
    It’ s my turn to give her sympathy.  Michelle and Derek have been trying for six years to have a baby.  Obviously, something’s wrong.  But Michelle wants to conceive naturally, believing that if it’s meant to be, then nature will take its course.  Derek, on the other hand, is all for medical intervention.  Both desperately want a baby.  I feel so bad.  They would make wonderful parents.
    “I’m sorry,” I tell her.  “It really sucks that you guys have to go through this.”
    “It’s okay,” she says, trying to wave off her sadness.  “Anyway…you know what I think?  Making a baby should be hard—it should be heartbreaking, and something you have to work for…because when it happens, then it truly feels like a miracle.  Maybe if making babies weren’t so easy for most people, then there wouldn’t be all these neglected children in the world.  When I finally get to hold that baby in my arms—man, I swear I will always treasure him or her.”
    My heart is so heavy for her.  But hearing her say something like that—it helps put things into perspective for me.  Me and my problems do not make up the universe—we are just a tiny speck in a world full of possibilities.  And hope.  As long as you’re alive, there is always hope.  That’s what I see in Michelle’s eyes right now.  And I’m so proud of her, proud to call her my au—
    Blaaarp!!!
    “Excuse me,” Michelle mutters, covering her mouth.  “Whoa, that was some spicy chicken!  Uh, I think we’d better go.  Yeah, let’s go.”
    I quickly throw down a twenty , not daring to look up.  “I’ll meet you in the car.”
     
    Later, when she’s dropping off me at the apartment, I swing my legs out of the car, but I turn back to face her.  “She still loves him, you know?” I confide.
    Michelle nods, unsurprised.  “And he still loves her.  B ut, sometimes, it isn’t enough.  Sometimes you have to ask yourself if the person you’re with makes you happy enough to forgive the misery they’ve caused.”
    Johnny, eyes full of apologies …
    Acid boils in my stomach.  I step out of the ca r onto the sidewalk.  “Some things can’t be forgiven,” I say