Free Going, Going, Gone! With the Pain and the Great One by Judy Blume Page B

Wolfman,” I told her.
    “You think the Wolfman wears a bathing suit?”
    “He does when he goes to the beach,” I said.
    “The Wolfman is covered with hair,” she said, “in case you didn’t know.”
    “He shaves it off in summer.”
    She laughed.
    So I shouted, “You
said
to wear a mask, remember?”
    “I meant a
dive
mask,” she said, “not a Halloween mask!”
    “That’s how much you know!” I told her. “Because this is a—” I had to think fast. “This is a
surfer
mask.”
    “A
surfer
mask?” The Great One laughed again.
    “If you don’t believe me, just ask the man at the store!”
    She was quiet for a minute. “He really told you it was a
surfer
mask?” she said. I knew she was looking at me. I could see her legs but not her face.
    “Yes, all the real surfers have them.” I was so hot I didn’t think I could last another minute inside my Wolfman mask.
    “Let me try it,” the Great One said.
    I pulled off my mask and handed it to her. It felt so good to be out of it.I dumped a bucket of
ocean
water over my head. I was careful to keep my eyes shut.
    “How do I look?” the Great One asked. She was posing like a surfer in my Wolfman mask. She looked totally stupid. But I said, “You look cool.”

    Then she was off, racing out to catch the next wave. But she missed and fell off her board. She fell off on her next try too. And the one after that.
    She whipped off the Wolfman mask and came tearing out of the ocean. “This mask doesn’t work!” she shouted, waving it in theair. “You tricked me, you little pain! You won’t get away with this!”

    But I was already racing down the beach, hoping she would never catch me.

EXTRAVAGANZA

Part One
    Aunt Diana took us to the county fair. She bought each of us twenty tickets. “I can’t believe how much these tickets cost,” she said. “Use them carefully.”
    “We will,” I told her.
    “I’m going on the Gravitron,” the Pain told me as Aunt Diana walked aheadof us, pushing the baby in his stroller.
    “No, you’re not,” I said. “You have to be at least twelve to go on the Gravitron.”
    “Ha ha,” he sang. “That’s how much you know!”
    I know plenty about the Gravitron. I know I’m never going on it. It spins around so fast it pins you against the wall while the floor disappears from under you. I learned about it from a TV show called
Amusement Ride Extravaganzas
.
    Aunt Diana turned to us and said, “Let’s see the farm animals first. Before the baby falls asleep.”
    The Pain leaned over and whispered to me, “Then the Gravitron!”
    The farm animals were in a big barn. First came the pigs. The baby clapped his hands and said “Uh-oh!” Then came the goats and fancy chickens and rabbits. The baby said “Uh-oh!” to everything.
    When we came out of the barn, the Pain poked me. “Time for the Gravitron!”
    But Aunt Diana had other ideas. “Let’s do the food hall next.”
    “Is the food hall like the food court at the mall?” the Pain asked.
    Aunt Diana laughed. “Not exactly,” she said.

    The food hall was filled with homegrown vegetables. The Pain kept running ahead, announcing what was coming next.
    “An eggplant that’s bigger than the baby!”
    “A tomato so huge it could be somebody’s head!”
    The baby clapped his hands and said, “Uh-oh!”
    When we came out of the food hall, Aunt Diana sat on a bench under a tree and gave the baby a bottle. The way things were going, I thought we’d never get to the rides. So I said, “Oh, look, Aunt Diana, there’s the Super Slide! The Super Slide is my favorite.”
    “Mine is the Gravitron,” the Pain said, jumping up and down.
    “Gravitron?” Aunt Diana said. “What’s that?”
    “It’s where you spin around so fast you’re mashed against the wall,” the Pain said. “It’s an
extravaganza!”
    “Whoa … that’s a big word,” Aunt Diana said.

    “He learned it from a TV show called
Amusement Ride Extravaganzas
,” I explained. “You