Free Indelible Love - Emily's Story by DW Cee Page B

tonight?”
    I cringed at the thought of having to
explain myself to him. I waited for him to finish before going into
my tedious explanation.
    “Door number one is my room, door
number two is Jane’s room, or you can sleep alone behind door
number three.” He pointed to each room with a hopeful and expectant
look.
    There was an awkward
silence.
    “Jake…I need to tell you something.” I
dragged his name a bit but quickly let out the next group of
words.
    “Uh-oh, did I say something
wrong?”
    “No, I guess it’s time to confess
since we’re at this juncture. Maybe I should have told you before
accepting your ring. You might have had second thoughts about
wanting me as your girlfriend.”
    Jake looked mildly horrified. “You’re
making me nervous; what’s wrong?”
    This conversation wasn’t nearly as
difficult to have the first time with Max at age eighteen but now,
I sounded so archaic telling my thirty-year-old boyfriend that I
wanted to stay a virgin.
    “Nothing is wrong. I should have told
you this earlier. I want you to know that I’ve never, um…” There
was no reason to be, but I was embarrassed.
    “Well…I’ve never slept with a man
before. You are literally the first man I fell asleep with earlier
today, though nothing happened. I’m not planning on being with you
or any man till I get married.” Incredibly nervous, I found my
hands tightly clutching my borrowed robe unable to look at Jake
till I finished confessing.
    Relief, confusion, happiness, and
chagrin all flashed across Jake’s face and in that order. “You mean
you and Max have never…?”
    “No, we’ve never been together in that
sense.”
    “But how? You dated for four
years.”
    “It was hard but I really wanted to
save myself for whomever I might end up marrying. My mom was old
fashioned, and she wanted me to wait till I got married. This was a
promise I made to her before she died, and I’d like to honor her
wishes. Also, watching my parents love each other, I thought it
would be most special with the man I’d spend the rest of my life
with.”
    “What if that man isn’t as pure as you
are?” He looked worried again.
    I chuckled, realizing he obviously
didn’t believe what I believed. “That’s all right. It would be most
perfect if we were each other’s first, but I can’t expect everyone
to have the same beliefs. Are you OK with my confession? I’m sorry
I didn’t bring it up earlier. I didn’t quite know how to approach
this subject. Are you upset?” My head fell back down worried what
Jake might think.
    “Disappointed, yes; upset, no. I guess
this happily speeds up our timetable.” Oddly, amusement mirrored
his disappointment.
    “What does that mean?”
    “Oh, that’s for me to know and for you
to soon find out.”
    I could hear a quiet sigh as he held
me in his arms till Jane walked back into the living room. He
gently kissed my lips and I followed Jane to her room.
    “Emily,” Jane carefully called my
name. “You don’t have to sleep in my room on my account. You can be
with Jake if you like.”
    “Jane, I want to be here with you if
you’re OK with it.”
    “I’d love it but is Jake OK with
this?”
    “I didn’t give him a choice.” I
giggled. After all was said and done, Jake accepted my revelation
without much of a fight. Maybe the physical part of our
relationship wouldn’t be too much of a struggle—or maybe this was
wishful thinking.
    “Where shall I sleep?” Jane’s room had
two twin bunks, reminding me of the summer camp I’d visited back in
sixth grade.
    “I sleep here on this bottom bunk. Why
don’t you take the other bottom bunk?”
    “Why are there so many beds in
here?”
    Jane’s pretty face broke into a laugh.
“There was a time in undergrad when we had so much rain, our
sorority house got flooded. My room, endearingly called, ‘the
jungle,’ had twelve girls and twelve beds. When we were all
displaced, we brought as many beds into this apartment as