Free Second Chances by T. A. Webb Page B

tried to get out of it, Antonio handed the phone to him. I told him thirty-one was too old for Chuck E. Cheese’s, and when his begging didn’t work, threats of tears did. God, it would have been like kicking a puppy. And I couldn’t do that. Yes, I’m an easy touch and a sucker. And he knew it. So here I sat, thanking God that at least there was beer in hell.
    Antonio and I lounged there, watching Jason play with all his new friends. His mother had already thrown his regular birthday party at her house, and he’s gotten his presents from all his cousins and friends. This day was to be something just for him and his dad. And now that included me.
    Before the holidays, I’d gotten Jason a couple of small gifts and left them with Antonio under the small tree at his place. Evidently that was all it took for me to be part of Jason’s family now. No “Uncle” stuff for him; I was just his dad’s best friend and therefore expected to be there when he came over every other weekend. At the minimum I had to talk to Jason on his cell phone.
    I still went for massages with Antonio, but somehow, after I loaned him the money and he paid me back, things changed. He didn’t charge me for massage anymore, and we were better, closer friends now. He was forever thanking me for loaning him the money, and I finally ended up just nodding and patting him on the shoulder every time. But the Thursday night thing didn’t change. We both ended up naked and massaging each other but it wasn’t a business transaction. Not even friends with benefits.
    I didn’t tell Brian. He was okay with me getting the massages, and even with the two of us hanging out sometimes. I did what I wanted with my money and had my own friends and he did the same. We paid the joint bills, but I made a lot more than he did so I never worried about that kind of stuff. The mortgage was in my name but he wrote me a check every month for his part.
    When he came back after my mom’s funeral, Brian got his job as a courier for a medical supply company back. He didn’t do well sitting eight hours at a desk, and didn’t have much patience for bosses in his face. So the freedom to be out of the office and moving around was heaven for him, even in the total clusterfuck that was Atlanta traffic. He had no desire to do anything more at this point in his life, and it drove me crazy. I was always so worried something would happen while he was on the road.
    But I knew he wouldn’t understand two grown men who weren’t fucking getting together and being naked. Even if one was straight. He could deal with me being naked—that was what happened with a massage. But Antonio being naked and me rubbing his body? I might be facing losing a couple of body parts I really, really enjoyed. He enjoyed them too, but he’d still cut them off while I slept.
    And the thing was, it was totally innocent. Neither one of us got hard. There was no sex, no jerking off, nothing like that. But it was still an intimacy I didn’t think I should share. It was private and nice, and not dirty. Still I kept it to myself.
    So Antonio and I hung out, went to movies sometimes. I saw Jason about once a month. And now I was stuck at his birthday party, wishing I was anywhere in the world but there in the middle of all that noise. Damn it, why couldn’t he have wanted to go to Manuel’s Tavern?
    “I appreciate you coming with us today. It means a lot to Jason,” Antonio said, bringing me back to reality. Or at least this noisy, flashing version of it.
    “I don’t mind. Really. If he wants… this, then I can put up with it for an hour or two,” I mumbled into my beer.
    “I’ll make it up to you. When I take him home, we can go back and hang out for a while. Have a couple of glasses of wine or something.” He kind of looked sideways at me. Hopeful, it seemed like.
    “Maybe. I really need to get home and do some things before Brian gets back. Saturday’s laundry day and all that shit. Got to see