Free With or Without You by KyAnn Waters Page B

the room.
    “It’s not that easy. I managed for all these years to keep a secret.” She took the seat across from Matt again. “But the truth is that I’ve lied to Brianna about her father. I didn’t tell her who he was even though I’ve always known.” Tears blurred her vision. “You see—” her voice trembled, “—he was destined for better than a teenage pregnancy. We weren’t close.” She wished Matt would say something, but he just watched her. His lips thinned and his eyes remained focused on her. Matt was too intuitive not to realize this story would somehow relate to him. If she didn’t want him guessing, she needed to tell him and accept whatever anger he justifiably felt.
    “When she was little she asked who her father was and I told her—sort of. I told her about a man that I’d dreamed about all through high school. Only I made those dreams the truth. I told her stories about you.”
    Matt leaned forward. “You told her I was her father?”
    “No. Oh God, Matt.” The tears fell. “I told her about you, but I didn’t tell her who you were.”
    Matt didn’t seem to be listening. He stood, crossed the room and stared at Brianna’s picture on the wall.
    Tessa followed him, but stood a few feet away. “I told her about you because I wanted her to know who you were without telling her exactly who you were.”
    Matt took the picture off the wall. His pallor revealed the dawning of understanding. He turned to Tessa.
    She covered her mouth with her hands. “I’m so sorry,” she whispered.
    He trailed his fingers over Brianna’s image, traced her lips, chin and nose—all gifts from her father.
    “She’s your daughter.” Tears streamed down Tessa’s cheeks and dripped from her face. “I know I can’t ask you to forgive me. But at least try to understand why I chose to raise her on my own. In the beginning, I thought I’d done the right thing by not ruining your scholarship, your potential career.” Tessa sighed and sat back down on the couch. “But then the years went by.”
    “So, if Brianna hadn’t called the show, I never would’ve known I had a child with you.” He sat, still clutching the picture in his hands.
    Tessa bowed her head. “Oh Matt, I wish I could say I would’ve found the courage to tell her…to tell you. But no, I don’t believe I ever would have.”
    He set the picture on the coffee table and stared at it. “She’s beautiful.”
    “She wants to meet you.”
    His head snapped up. “You told her.”
    Tessa nodded.
    “When?”
    “After the show. She wanted to know why I wouldn’t see you again. I was scared, but I finally realized I couldn’t lie to either one of you anymore.”
    “That’s fucking good of you. Lie for twenty years and now you develop a conscience. Bullshit. You couldn’t hide the truth anymore.”
    She deserved his anger. Moreover, she didn’t have a right to steal Brianna’s childhood from him. “I’m sorry.”
    “Damn you. Sorry isn’t good enough.” He rubbed his hand over his forehead. “We had a daughter.” He picked up the picture again. “I can’t stop looking at her.”
    “I don’t blame you for hating me, but please give Brianna a chance.”
    His eyes narrowed. “You really think I’d walk away from her? I won’t now…and I wouldn’t have twenty years ago, either.”
    Tessa shook her head. “We barely knew each other then, we barely know each other now.”
    He shook his head. “You don’t know me at all.”
    Pain pierced her heart. She did know him, realized now the gravity of her lie. “I was wrong. I should’ve told you.”
    “Yes, you should have. You didn’t have a right.” He tucked the picture under his arm. “I need her phone number.”
    Tessa nodded and went to the kitchen for a pen and paper. The kitchen table reminded her of what had just happened between them, the love that surged in her heart while he’d filled her body. Too much history, history he only just learned about, worked