Free What I Remember Most by Cathy Lamb Page A

office skills. I have never worked in an office. I like some people, others not. I’m instinctually a loner and have major trust issues with other humans. I am rigidly organized, though.
    “Computer skills?”
    “Yes.” Basic. I am quite talented at e-mail.
    “Don’t be scared of him. I mean, at least try not to be scared. You will, but hide it.”
    “I’ll give it my best shot.”
    “It’s a girl.”
    “Pardon?”
    “It’s a girl. She’s kicking me all over. It’s a rebel. A bloomin’ rebel . . . okay, see you after I have my feet clamped in stirrups, a knife an inch from my ya ya.”
    Whew. That image made me close my eyes in fright for her.
    We chatted more about the baby and her pregnancy, then she regaled me with how she gave birth to the first kid without an epidural because he came too quick—“the stinker ripped me wide open”—and the second kid was “butt down.” “I was screaming, I thought I was dying, they had to cut me open like a fish.”
    I doubled over on the park bench. Now I felt nauseated. “Thank you, Bajal, for recommending me. I mean it. I appreciate this so much.” My forehead was sweating.
    “You seem like a nice lady and I hope Kade hires you. Hang on . . . here it comes again . . . whoo whoo whoo. Good-bye nice, neat vagina, you’re about to be shredded and bloody again.”
    On that, we rung off. I put my hand over my mouth, breathed. Breathed again.
    Poor Bajal. Poor, poor Bajal.

10
    Children’s Services Division
    Child’s Name: Grenadine Scotch Wild
    Age: 6
    Parents’ Names: Freedom and Bear Wild (Location unknown)
    Date: July 5, 1982
    Goal: Adoption
    Employee: Wanda Turgood
     
    After three weeks in Raymond and Lennie Chang’s medical foster home, Grenadine seems to have made a full physical recovery from her concussion except she is still too thin and is having trouble eating because of stress.
     
    Emotionally she is traumatized and cries often, according to the Changs. She is asking for her parents and begging to talk to the police about them. I told her the police were doing all they could.
     
    The police have talked to Grenadine several times. She told the police that they had to search harder to find her parents and she said they were bad at their jobs, then she apologized.
     
    She will be placed with Tom and Adelly Berlinsky.
     
    The Berlinskys have two boys, age ten and twelve, and live in a ranch home in the country. Father is a trucker, mother is a stay-at-home mother. This is their first year as foster care parents, and they seemed pleased to have Grenadine. I know they are hoping to adopt a little girl.
     
    Her new case worker is Connie Valencia.
     
     
    Children’s Services Division
    Child’s Name: Grenadine Scotch Wild
    Age: 6
    Parents’ Names: Freedom and Bear Wild (Location unknown)
    Date: August 8, 1982
    Goal: Adoption
    Employee: Connie Valencia
     
    I visited Grenadine today at the Berlinsky family home. She seems happy, although she looks kind of thinnish and has circles under her eyes, a purplish color, and bumpy bug bites on her arms.
     
    She wanted to know if we’d found her parents. I said no. I told her the police are still looking. I don’t like to lie to a child. Poor thing.
     
    Because of the trauma she has experienced, I am not concerned that she cried when I was there at the house with her and seemed scared and skinny as a skeleton. (Not really a skeleton! That’s an expression!)
     
    I tried to calm her down. She was in a pretty pink, long-sleeved dress with a ruffle, white tights, and shiny white shoes. She said she didn’t like her clothes because they itch.
     
    Mrs. Berlinsky did not leave her side at all during the visit while I asked Grenadine questions about how she was doing and what she was doing. She said she was making paintings for her parents because they’re lost (she thinks). The paintings were actually super duper. One was of three birdies flying. Each of the birdies had one of those T-shirts on with all