Free The Unwanted Earl by Ruth J. Hartman Page B

tresses and green eyes mesmerized him to his core. He’d never felt anything remotely like it when he’d courted Lucy. Nor had he had those stirrings for any other woman. Ever.
    What did that say about him that the one woman who set his heart on fire was only marrying him for a reason other than love? He didn’t know the exact reason, yet, but surely she wouldn’t have resorted to something of such nefarious character as blackmail if there weren’t an underlying cause.
    The irony didn’t escape him that he was making excuses for what she was putting him through. He certainly had never made excuses for anyone else before. About anything. Perhaps he’d lost his mind and was becoming someone no one would recognize.
    I can hope. Becoming a better man is my goal. Could Amelia be a part of that change?
    Still, being at the Bird Sanctuary was bringing back memories. Terrible ones. He hadn’t a way to hide his reactions to it, no matter how much he might want to impress Amelia.
    Memories of wanting to venture outside as a child and see and hear the birds around the Lofton estate played out in his mind. Every time, his mother forbade it. Once in a while, he’d sneak out when she wasn’t looking but was always dragged back in and given a scolding for disobeying and bringing the dusty outdoors inside with him on his clothes and person.
    A thorough scrubbing by one of the maids would follow. He especially hated when he got Hilda for the job. She was rough when she washed him, nearly to the point of rubbing him raw. The woman must have had talons for fingers.
    Talons… He threw the thought aside. Hard to imagine that once, long ago, he’d actually longed to go outside. His mother had squelched any desire of that to the point that now when he was outside for any length of time and came in contact with wildlife, he was sometimes even afraid.
    “ Conrad?”
    He startled out of his reverie at Amelia’s voice. “Yes?”
    “ You looked to be off in another time, somehow.”
    I was . “Nonsense.”
    “ Ready to proceed?”
    No . “Certainly.” Conrad allowed Amelia to lead him down the path even though he’d just questioned her about doing that very thing. His legs protested delving further into the shade of the groves of trees, the dirt along the path, the grasses swaying in the cool breeze.
    The only way for him to do Amelia’s bidding and remain in the Sanctuary was if she propelled him there by her own power. Amelia’s maid harrumphed and followed along behind them. Those two didn’t seem to get along very well. Reminds me of my relationship with my servants . Perhaps he and Amelia had similar personalities in that regard. More’s the pity.  
    They veered from the path and walked through some shin-deep grass. Who knew what vermin lurked in there? Conrad averted his eyes from the ground and instead looked up. Very big mistake. Overhead, a flock of geese in a V formation descended to land near a pond a few yards away.
    “ Look.” Amelia pointed. “We’ll have a chance to see the geese up close.”
    Oh the horror . “Splendid.”
    The honking of the geese set Conrad’s teeth on edge. Thankfully his jaw no longer throbbed when he clenched them together. The huge grey birds flapped enormous wings and splashed about in the water.
    Mother would have been appalled.
    When Conrad would have stopped a relatively safe distance away, Amelia dragged him on. Closer… closer… The sound of the birds was deafening. And the smell…
    Out came his handkerchief again. It was earning its keep today. He pressed it against his nose and mouth, hoping to avoid the worst of the stench.
    “ Conrad, watch your—” Amelia grabbed his arm tightly. “Oh no, too late.”
    With trepidation, he glanced down. Greenish slime, which he could only attribute to something one of those ghastly geese left behind, covered the entire toe of his boot.
    Perfect.
    Resigned to his fate, he leaned down and wiped most of it away with his handkerchief. A