Free Wasted by Suzy Spencer Page B

feel X was really a drug. “Shit, X was legal for a while,” she said. “Come on, try it, Y. It’s not gonna hurt.”
    “No.” Ynema Mangum was adamant. She was tiring of the drinking and partying. “No, Regina. No.”
    “You’re not a very good party girl.”
    Mangum had spent a lot of years wasting her time because she wasn’t in control of her life. She made a conscious decision to get rid of excess baggage in her life. That baggage included friends who she felt made choices that weren’t healthy for her.
    Ynema and Kathy parted ways. Regina and Kathy parted ways. And Regina and Ynema began to get together only on rare occasions.

    Regina, however, had girlfriends for eighty miles up and down Interstate 35, from Austin to San Antonio. Some of the girls were just friends. Others were just one-night stands, like Rosie Rulle. Others were for love.
    Pam Carson was for love. Pam was gorgeous, young, and worshipped Regina. Regina loved young girls to worship her.
    Carson had heard a lot about Regina Hartwell. Regina was rich, she was generous, and she was interested in Pam’s friend Fran Morgan. One January day in 1993, Pam was sitting alone in Fran’s apartment in San Antonio when Regina called long-distance.
    That didn’t stop Regina from grilling Pam for an hour about Fran. “Well,” said the young Pam, “I’m not going to tell you much, but I’m just going to say, be careful, and just don’t get hurt.”
    Carson knew that Morgan was a bit of a “money sucker,” and that she was more interested in what Hartwell bought her than in Hartwell herself. “Be careful,” said Pam.
    “I’ve heard that you’re very cute,” Regina replied, “and I’d like to meet you.” Pam was a 5’7” tall, black-haired, blue eyed, fair-skinned beauty.
    Regina later phoned Pam and invited her to Austin, and Pam accepted. But Pam and Fran got into an argument because Regina had told Fran that Pam had warned her to be careful. No longer trusting Regina, Pam didn’t talk to her after that. In fact, they just plain didn’t like each other, but, they didn’t really know each other either.
     
     
    Regina Hartwell and some of her friends drove down to San Antonio to party in the Alamo city’s gay clubs. Carson was in one of the clubs with some of her friends, and her friends knew Hartwell’s friends. They all drank and danced together until closing.
    Afterwards, everyone, including Regina, went over to Carson’s, and Regina and Pam talked long into the night. They got to know one another and learned they had a lot in common: loss. Pam’s sister had recently been murdered; Pam was grieving and drinking.
    “My mother died when I was twelve,” said Hartwell. “I’ve never really talked to anyone about that. She was crushed to death by a hangar door. It wrecked me. I loved my mother more than anything. The only thing that was broken was her little finger. That was the only bone that was broken. My mother was so beautiful. I’ll never forget seeing her in the casket. I didn’t know how to react.”
    Regina looked up at Pam. “It’s weird how we’ve both suffered losses so young,” Regina said. “A lot of our friends just don’t comprehend that.”
    Regina was being real. Other times, she mouthed off or cut people down to hide her emotions. But Pam liked this Regina. They took each other by the hand and walked into a spare bedroom. They spent the night together. They didn’t have sex, but they did everything else. Pam found it to be a very good night.
     
     
    The next day, Hartwell showed up at Carson’s workplace. “I’ve bought tickets to Europe,” she said. “I’ve gone to talk to a travel agent, and I’m going to take you and Brandy to Europe.” Brandy Wynne was an up-and-coming Austin singer and a good friend of Carson’s.
    “No, I can’t afford it,” said Pam.
    “Don’t worry, I’m going to buy it.”
    “No, no, no,” said Pam.
    Hartwell and Wynne went behind Carson’s back and bought