Free The Purity Myth by Jessica Valenti

should be paying more attention to one kind of sexualization than to another, but there’s a disturbing gap when it comes to which girls we’re more apt to hear about.
    † Yes, these exist. I’m somewhat embarrassed to admit that as a freshman in college (at
    Tulane University in New Orleans), I succumbed to the sexy-costume craze by donning a white minidress with a red cross drawn across the chest—I was a “nurse.” I promptly learned my lesson after a male passerby on Bourbon Street screamed out that I was a “bloody-hot nurse.” I thought perhaps he was British, but alas, he was actually oh-so- subtly letting me know that I had gotten my period early that month.

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    can buy your daughter a Playboy pencil set or your infant Heelicious shoes— baby stilettos—anytime!
    “There has been a marked shift in the proliferation of hypersexualized imagery being marketed to younger and younger girls, as well as more repre- sentations of very young girls—I’m talking about tweens and preschoolers— in sexually provocative poses and contexts,” says Durham, author of The Lolita Effect: The Media Sexualization of Young Girls and What We Can Do About It . 5 “These are highly repressive and regressive notions of sexuality, not healthy, ac- curate, or developmentally appropriate concepts of sex.”
    A 2007 report from the American Psychological Association (APA) found that nearly every form of media studied provided “ample evidence of the sexualization of women,” and that most sexualization focused on young women. 6 * Th report also showed that this sexualization did not come from media alone. Girls’ relationships with parents, educators, and peers further contributed to the problem.

    [P]arents may convey the message that maintaining an at tractive physi- cal appearance is the most important goal for girls . Some may allow or encourage plastic surgery to help girls meet that goal. Research shows
    that teachers sometimes encourage girls to play at being sexualized adult women or hold beliefs that girls of color are “ hypersexual” and thus un-
    likely to achieve academic success. Both male and female peers have been

    * The APA defines sexualization as when “a person’s value comes only from his or her sexual appeal or behavior, to the exclusion of other characteristics; a person is held to a standard that equates physical attractiveness (narrowly defined) with being sexy; a per- son is sexually objectified—that is, made into a thing for others’ sexual use, rather than seen as a person with the capacity for independent action and decision making; and/or sexuality is inappropriately imposed upon a person.”

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    found to contribute to the sexualization of girls—girls by policing each other to ensure conformance with standards of thinness and sexiness and boys by sexually objectifying and harassing girls . 7

    Girls are getting it from all angles—home, school, and the media. What makes matters worse, according to Durham, is that the girls being targeted are even younger than they were in years past. The reason behind it? “It may be a backlash against the fact that women are succeeding in life in ways they never did before, and little girls represent a traditional version of docile, passive femi- ninity,” says Durham.*
    Touting girls and girlhood as ideal forms of sexuality is simply another way of advancing the notion that to be desirable, women need to be un-adults— young, naive, and impressionable. Being independent, assured, and grown up has no place in this disconcerting model.
    The virginity movement is fighting sexualization with more sexual- ization—we just don’t always recognize it as such because it’s shrouded in language about modesty, purity, and protection.
    Take the latest trend in virginity worship: purity balls. Fa- thers escort their daughters to these promlike balls, where at some point—between the dancing, food, and entertainment