Free Dreaming Awake by Gwen Hayes Page A

around my waist, his fingers pressing into my back. “Forgive me?”
    Hopeless. When he touched me, I was completely in his thrall. “I don’t know. If I forgive you, what will we do instead of fight?”
    “I’m sure we can find something to pass the time.” His eyes darkened even more and my belly fluttered at his words.
    He began at my shoulder and trailed soft kisses up the line of my neck and to my jawbone. I wanted . . . no, I
needed
Haden with a yearning so ferocious it scared me. It felt like he’d struck a match inside me and burned away everything that wasn’t him. I clutched him tightly, afraid that if I let go I’d fall off the world.
    The yearning had a will of its own and I trembled with its ache. I had no reserve of control left. I
wanted
to surrender completely to desire, to Haden. The roaring of my heartbeat filled my ears as I let my body brush more firmly against his.
    Every cell blossomed with longing; there wasn’t a part of me that wasn’t aware of him. I craved Haden like oxygen, wanted him closer. I felt the searing brand of his lips and knew he touched my soul with them. We tumbled onto his bed, a jumble of arms and legs and lips. I just couldn’t get close enough.
    “Theia, stop.”
    I heard him, on some level, but not one that I heeded.
    “Theia.” Haden held my wrists together between us with one strong hand. His chest was heaving and his lips were swollen and stained pink. Mine must have looked the same. They felt so tender. Vulnerable. “We can’t.”
    The words sounded as if they’d been torn from him.
    “Why? Haden, why? Are you worried that I don’t want to?”
    “No.” He laughed a little then, sitting up. “You’re pretty clear about your signals right now.”
    I should have been embarrassed, but wasn’t. “Then why?” He still grasped my wrists, so I curled up onto my knees and leaned towards him. “I want to. I’m not even scared.” Well, okay, a little scared.
    He groaned. “You’re making this very difficult.”
    “Good.” I tried to reach for a kiss, but he held me away.
    The rejection felt like a blow to my chest. I eased back onto my calves, looking at him as the haze of desire cleared. “You don’t want me?” I whispered.
    Haden cut me off with a forceful kiss, stealing my breath. When he stopped, he rested his forehead to mine. “I
never
don’t want you. I swear. I wanted you even when I couldn’t remember who you were. Amnesia couldn’t keep me from recognizing that you are the other half of me—nothing will ever make me not crave you.”
    We stayed like that for a moment. As in the past, I felt my heart skip and then resume a new rhythm, one that matched his. We both felt it. Our hearts synced in beat and yet I couldn’t get close enough to him.
    “Why can’t we? Haven’t we been through enough trials? Nothing is promised to us, Haden. We need to take happiness where we can get it.”
    Tomorrow might be too late. A shadow might steal the light.
    The muscle in his jaw twitched. “I can’t make love to you, Theia. Not like this, and not now.”
    “What is standing between us now? You risked your life to save me.”
    He traced his finger down my cheek. “Don’t think I’ve forgotten your sacrifice.”
    “Then what? What’s keeping us apart now?”
    “You’re an innocent.”
    I rolled my eyes. “I took a blood oath with a mare demon. I have demon blood inside me now. That book Amelia used didn’t think I was innocent.”
    “But you are.” His voice lowered. “You aren’t a demon, not really; you’ve only been poisoned by one. But I am, and you are an . . .
innocent
.”
    A blush heated my skin and my cheeks felt too warm. Whatever words were coming next he didn’t want to say and I certainly didn’t want to hear.
    Haden squeezed my hands. “If a demon takes a virgin . . .”
    I couldn’t look at him.
    He let go of my hands and cupped my chin, bringing my gaze back to his. “If I take your virginity—” He bit