Free Falling Up by Melody Carlson Page B

pregnant will ruin my life. It's already ruiningmy life. Sometimes I feel like I'm going crazy or that I might kill myself. I want to know two things. Do you think abortion is wrong? Do you think abortion is safe?
       2 Scared 2 Talk
    Oh, man! I have a really creepy feeling that Nat wrote this letter. It would explain everything. Its so tempting to call her right now, to ask her if she's pregnant, but that would blow my cover. And then what? The next column comes out in Friday's edition. If I make sure this letter makes it, I can act like I read the letter in the paper, and it made me wonder if she might possibly be worried about something like that. I know it sounds hokey, but I think it's my best plan. In the meantime, I am really going to be praying for Nat. And I'm praying that God will help me to answer this.
    Dear 2 Scared
,
   
You definitely sound freaked. But I wonder why you feel so scared about being pregnant My guess is that ifs inconvenient and embarrassing. But stuff like that happens to lots of people, and you just have to face up to it and get over the initial shock. First of all, I suggest you talk to someone-anyone-about what's going on. You need a friend to lean on right now. As far as abortion goes
…
1 personally think that extinguishing an innocent human life just to make yourself “feel better” is wrong. Is it safe? According to my research, like any other invasive
medical procedure, it has risks involved-but the greatest risks are to the unborn baby. And oh yeah, I've heard that lots of women suffer from guilt and can require counseling for years afterward. My advice to you is to talk to someone-a parent, pastor, counselor, friend. Now!
       
Just Jamie
    My hands are actually shaking as I type my response. I feel almost certain this letter is from Natalie. I mean, she's been so different lately. She's moody and depressed, and it's hard to believe it's all because of Ben's breakup. I know it's crazy, but it seems highly possible that she could've written this letter. Or even if this is a coincidence, she could be in a position like this.
    Although I can't believe that Nat would actually consider abortion. She's always been totally opposed to it. She's even gone to protest demonstrations, the kind where they carry posters of photographs of unborn babies.
    But when I reread the line where the writer says she might even kill herself, I feel more freaked than ever. What if this is Natalie? And suddenly Friday seems so far away, and I wonder if there's something I can do sooner. So I walk down the street to her house, knock on the door, and after what seems like ten minutes, Krissy answers.
    “Hi Kim,” she says. She has smears of chocolate all over her face.
    “Is Nat here?”
    Krissy nods. “But she doesn't want to be bugged. I think she's taking a nap.”
    “I won't bug her,” I promise. Then I go upstairs, tiptoe to her room, and open the door. And Krissy is right; Nat is peacefully sleeping. Well, I suppose that's not such a bad thing—maybe I'm overreacting. Although I think I've heard that women get sleepy when they're pregnant. But maybe I'm just blowing this all out of proportion.
    “Tell her I stopped by,” I say to Krissy as I'm about to leave. Then I look around the messy house—TV blaring, clothes and papers and stuff everywhere. “Are you guys okay?”
    Krissy just shrugs.
    “Where's Micah?”
    She shrugs again. “I think he's at baseball.”
    “Oh.” Then without saying anything, I start picking up the clutter, the old newspapers and junk mail, food dishes, dirty socks. And Krissy, without saying anything, actually follows my lead.
    We end up in the kitchen, which is really a mess, and Krissy tries to help, but mostly she just sits on a stool and watches me as I load and turn on the dishwasher, then start scrubbing the sticky countertops.
    “Why are you cleaning our house?” she finally asks.
    I look up at her. “I don't know…I just wanted to help.”
    “Are you