Free A Dream Forbidden (Lillith Mercury ) by Tracey H. Kitts Page A

damp washcloth as he knelt beside me.
    "If he dies because of your moral standards, is that something you could live with?" He paused before adding, "Because I can't live with knowing I kept you from saving him."
    "Marco, what are you saying?" I asked shakily.
    "But I can't give you my blessing either," he said helplessly.
    He was scaring me.
    "Marco, don't leave me," I pleaded.
    "I'm not going anywhere," he soothed. "You do what you have to do, and I'll try to find a way to live with it. Because I can't live with being the cause of his death."
    "And I can't live with being the cause of yours," I thought as I looked at his face.
    "I would never deliberately do anything to hurt you, Marco, you know that," I said as he hugged me to him.
    "I know, Red. You do enough by accident."
    Just when I was about to start crying again he said, "I will still be around. It may take me some time, but I'll be around. I knew this might happen when I first saw him." He sighed. "When I saw the way you looked at him … you can't decide who you love, Red. And I can't bring myself to hate him for wanting the same thing I do."
    "I was so happy." I cried, pressing my face against his stomach. "I love you, Marco, I swear I do. But I can't abandon him," I wailed. "I can't leave him if there's a chance that I could save him. I wish to God I could just walk away, but I can't."
    "Then don't," he said. "If anyone understands you, Red, it's me. Remember when I turned you down and you ended up spending the night with Dracula?"
    How could I forget? It was the first time the beast had overtaken me and I wasn't in the middle of a fight. I had lost control completely. The beast is only calmed by food, violence, or sex. I had just found out Alfred signed on to be my murderer as well as my partner, and I went nuts. Marco had to leave to save some members of the pack. People were dying and he still came running to my rescue, but he couldn't stay. He sent me home to eat something, but what I craved was waiting in my bedroom. That was the first and only time I had been with Dracula, but I wanted it to be Marco.
    "It was my fault," he said softly. "If I hadn't turned you down, you never would have gone to him. But if I had stayed with you, people would have died. People I care about. That was something I couldn't live with, and you and I seem to be living together just fine."
    It was then I realized how fortunate I was to have a man like Marco in my life. But I couldn't stop myself from asking, "What if this is something you can't live with?"
    "I'll try."
    After we had both showered he said, "When you find out more about these vamps you tell me, and if he needs the pack's help, you let me know."
    "I will."
    "In the meantime, Red, try not to worry. Things have a way of working themselves out. Even this."
    As stupid as it may seem, I felt better after his reassurance. Marco's voice has a way of making the world go away when I need it to, even if it's just for a little while.
    * * * *
    Friday night was Ms. Wilson's tea party. I had known her my whole life, and she would be very disappointed if I didn't attend. Not just because she would miss me, but because I was bringing Dracula. As it turns out, they had known each other a long time ago. Ms. Wilson had been in love with a vampire, and Dracula had saved her from being lynched along with her lover. She was willing to die for Eric, but Dracula wouldn't allow it. After a while, she understood and thanked him for saving her. Now, she was holding the tea party at night in order for him to be able to attend. The plan was originally to have the party two days after my birthday, but it had been postponed by the weather. A week later wasn't terribly off schedule.
    I wore a black dress that I suppose could have passed for a sundress, if there was any sun. The weather was warm enough that I could go sleeveless, even at night. I had let my short hair grow to the point of being shaggy. It hung in layers down the back of my neck and