Free One Last Lie by Rob Kaufman Page A

have been inseminated with donor sperm and later brought the donor to court for one reason or the other. Previous trial outcomes show that although states differ in their opinions, most courts rule in favor of the child — the offspring of the plaintiff. So, back to the example of Angela losing her job and bringing you to court for more child support. If the court decided more money was needed for child’s health and well-being, they would rule in favor of an increase in child support. The offspring takes precedence, not the disagreements between parties. As a matter of fact, in a recent ruling in Pennsylvania, the court imposed a statute regarding child support by a donor. They declared parents are liable for the support of their children who are unemancipated and 18 years or younger. In your case, legally speaking, Jonathan would be considered the parent. It doesn’t matter whether the child is living with him or not. The fact that he donated sperm makes him the parent. Period. So let’s take the subject of child support first.”
    “But we’ve already discussed child support and definitely plan on providing it,” Jonathan said. “We figured we’d agree on a monthly amount with Angela. I mean, it would be our child and we’d want to help him, or her, have a great life. That’s the way it should be, right?”
    G looked at Philip, who was nodding in agreement.
    “Okay, we’d have to draw up papers stating the minimum and maximum amount of support. But I’ll say it again: what’s on paper doesn’t always prove out in court.” G stood and walked to the other end of the table. She placed her fists on the polished mahogany. “You see, although you’re writing and signing a document with the mother of the child, you’re not constructing the agreement with the child. That means some courts would say your documents don’t constitute a written agreement, since the child never had a say in the matter at hand.” She looked at Jonathan, then Philip. “Does that make sense?”
    “Yes,” said Philip. “Perfect sense. But that’s one of the main reasons we wanted to agree to provide support now. Then, if by some crazy turn of circumstances this goes off track, we won’t be caught off guard. We’ll have already agreed to the support issue. And we’re doing well, financially, so we can keep little Jonny, or Joany, comfortable.” He clasped his hands and hugged the back of his head. “Now, what about parental rights? How often can we see him?” He smiled at Jonathan. “Sorry… or her?”
    G sat down and rested her chin on her hands. “For now, let’s assume it’ll be a he. The subject of parental rights make this even more complicated. For instance, do you want to sign a consent agreeing to give up all parental rights, which implies you won’t make any decisions regarding his upbringing, or do you want to be involved in how he’s raised?”
    Jonathan leaned forward. “We’d definitely like visitation rights so we can see him, have him spend weekends with us, bring him on trips, to the museums, baseball games, stuff like that. I can’t say it would be a daily kind of thing. We’d want to make sure he isn’t being abused or neglected in any way, of course. Do we have to decide that now?”
    G pointed to her pad at the other end of the table. “Philip, can you slide that down here, please?”
    When the pad reached her, she pulled reading glasses from her breast pocket and let them rest of the edge of her nose. After flipping through about a dozen pages, she read:
    “First off, in many states, true sperm donors are only those men whose sperm are inseminated through a licensed physician. So if you plan on informally donating your sperm, which I advise against, you probably won’t be protected when it comes to paternity and visitation rights. Giving your sperm to a physician and letting the doctor give it to the mother can mean the difference between being considered a sperm donor and a parent. But