Free Money Shot: Selected Sinners MC Romance by Scott Hildreth Page A

and I realized I had spent an immeasurable amount of time wallowing in my sorrows. Spiraling into a state of self-pity wasn’t something I needed to do, and I knew focusing on my review should resolve the issue.
    I grabbed the bottle of wine, raised it to my lips, and took a long drink. Much to my surprise, the flow of the sweet substance abruptly stopped, leaving me holding a useless glass paperweight over my bobbing head.
    How in the fuck did that happen?
    I blinked my eyes and stared at the bottle. It was definitely empty, even though I had opened it only a few minutes prior.
    I swear, they’re making these bottles smaller. Maybe the glass is thicker and they hold less... 
    I shook the bottle, gazed blankly at the bottom, and shoved it onto the desk beside my monitor. After teetering back and forth for a few seconds, it stopped quivering and came to rest upright and…
    Empty.
    The bottle’s ability to hold itself upright after I tossed it across my desk was all the proof I needed that the wineries were making the glass thicker, and providing me with much less of the nerve soothing potion I required to complete my Sunday night ritual.
    Fuckers.
    I glared at the screen, angry about the wine situation. “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” by The Pretenders calmed my nerves as I began to read my glorious review.
    You’re probably reading this review wondering just what book I read. Well, don’t let all the five star reviews fool you. I’m drunk enough, experienced enough, and lack fear of retribution enough to give an honest opinion.
    And here it is.
    This book was awful.
    And regardless of how many tens of thousands of followers the author has, I’m not afraid to admit it.
    I refuse to fall in line with every other reader or reviewer who states this book is a “great read” or “fabulous” just because the author is a well-recognized figure in the industry.
    Newsflash.
    Five star reads are NOT books that have unbelievable characters doing unbelievable things.
    This book read like an episode of the Jerry fucking Springer Show.
    I fell in love with the guy who raped me as a teen, and used to come to my house as a babysitter and tie me up in the basement and stick broom handles in my twat. He beat me unconscious when I was twenty, and my family moved away, but I decided to stay because I truly loved him.
    Then, after a few years of suggesting and me willingly complying with his requests to have threesomes with him and his brother, I woke up and decided to break it off.
    After six months of sulking and smoking meth, I decided to give his other brother a try, only to fall in love with the stepfather.
    Are you fucking kidding me right now?
    As I read this worthless piece of shit, I held my breath in wait of the trip to Tijuana and the Shetland pony show. That’s really all this book was missing.
    Great read?
    I think not.
    Hot sex scenes?
    No.
    Well written?
    Yes.
    But I don’t care to read another hot sex scene when the h is mentally challenged and incapable of standing up for herself against an H who is overbearing, has a thirteen inch cock, and can fuck for twelve hours straight without the aid of a Viagra.
    “Fuck me and my brother, okay?”
    “I don’t want to, it’s not right…”
    “How can it be wrong if I want it and you love me, Aphilia?”
    “I guess it can’t. Okay, I’ll do it, but only because I love you…”
    That, ladies and gentlemen, is a direct quote from this five star read. I’m sorry, but I about barfed.
    And who in the absolute fuck names their kid Aphilia, anyway?
    Nobody.
    Want a five star review?
    Write me a book about a girl named Sienna who gets her brains fucked out buy a bearded biker.
    My rating? Half a star because I liked the dedication, but with great reluctance I must give it one star because Goodreads won’t allow zero.
    I published the review and reached for the bottle of wine. After raising it to my lips, I realized it was the same empty bottle I had so eagerly