Free Once We Were by Kat Zhang Page B

Sabine, Jackson and Vince. Cordelia mentioned Katy, though if Katy actually took control at any point, no one noted it. But all night, no one said anything about the other boy looking through Christoph’s eyes. I wondered when we’d get to meet him. I found myself looking forward to it.
    Devon gave us a quiet
good night
when we returned to our apartment, then headed upstairs. I eased Emalia’s door open as softly as I could.
    The apartment was as still and silent as when we’d left hours before. I crossed the darkened living room, crept through the hall, and slipped into our bedroom. Kitty was a slumbering shadow tucked into her sheets. We exchanged our clothes for pajamas and slid into bed, our cheek pressed against the cold pillow.
    Only then did the implications of what I’d agreed to hit me. Hard. I took a deep breath, and Addie must have sensed my sudden trepidation. She reached for me. Held me steady.
    Did I choose right?
I almost asked, but didn’t. In the end, I didn’t need to. Addie told me, without saying a word, that whatever I chose, we were in it together.
    We fell asleep whispering about plans for the future. We hadn’t had any, before.
     
    Addie and I slept in the next morning, waking only when a knock came at the front door. We went to answer it in our secondhand pajamas, our hair a sleep-tangled mess of half curls. She yawned and looked through the peephole, probably expecting Hally or Ryan, like I was.
    
Addie said when we recognized Jackson.
    I wasn’t a slob, but Addie had always been the one who liked our clothes pressed, our hair neat, who made sure our room was tidy. She could be forgetful, might misplace things from time to time, but Addie had always wanted things orderly.
    
I suggested.
    
She sighed.

    She fumbled with the lock with one hand and tried to tame our hair with the other, then quickly lowered our hand as she opened the door.
    “Hey,” she said.
    Jackson studied us a moment.
Stop it,
I wanted to tell him.
Can’t you see you’re making Addie more embarrassed?
But he didn’t look away, just smiled. “Late morning?”
    Addie waved him inside. I could feel her
want
to say something, but no words came to our lips. We flushed. Jackson glanced around the room. “Where are Kitty and Emalia?”
    “Kitty’s in our room,” Addie said. “Emalia’s at Peter’s.”
    “Ah,” Jackson said.
    “
Ah
, what?”
    He laughed and plunked down in one of the dining chairs. “Nothing. It’s good that she’s out. I came to see how you were. You know, after last night.”
    Addie lowered us into a chair as well. “We didn’t change our minds, if that’s what you mean.”
    “I don’t remember getting an answer from you, actually,” Jackson said. “Eva said she was ready to start doing something. But what about you?”
    “I didn’t know we had to speak separately.”
    Jackson’s pale blue eyes never left ours, even for a second. They lent everything he said—despite the artlessness in his movements and the jaunt in his grin—a certain intensity. “I like to hear what you have to say.”
    Addie was quiet, picking at our pajama pants.
    
    “I’m in,” she said.
    Jackson leaned toward us, and Addie didn’t back away. I felt the tension in our muscles, the strain it took to keep our position. He was pushing on too close—too close for Addie to take. “Good. What about Devon’s sister? Hally? Do you think she’s going to be okay with this?”
    Addie nodded.
    “Did you guys know each other a long time before Nornand?” Jackson asked. “You, Devon, and Hally?”
    “Not a very long time,” Addie said. She shrugged. “A month or so.”
    I waited for her to explain how she wasn’t even there for most of it, or how Devon wasn’t exactly the easiest person to get to know under any circumstances, for any