Free Protecting Jessyka (SEAL of Protection) (Volume 6) by Susan Stoker Page A

words of encouragement. He hadn’t rushed her, as a lot of men might have. Jess thought they were in the room for at least an hour. Every time Jess had decided she was ready to go, she couldn’t make herself leave.
    Finally she was ready. Jess thought she’d gone through all five stages of grief in that hour with Tabitha. First she had tried to deny she was really dead. Tabitha had looked so normal, that she hadn’t believed she could be dead at first. Then she’d gotten mad. Tabitha had no right to kill herself. It was selfish and inconsiderate of their friendship. Then Jess had moved to the bargaining stage. Kason had to reel her back in from that one. She’d gone back to the “if only” statements she’d made the night before. Kason gently reminded her that it wasn’t her fault and there wasn’t anything Jess could have done to make the outcome any different.
    Finally she cried. Hard. It was depressing as hell to see such a wonderful person, lifeless. The world would never get to read her wonderful stories, they’d never get to see what an awesome person Tabitha was. Finally, Jess had moved to acceptance. Tabitha was dead. She wasn’t in pain anymore. Jess didn’t have to worry about her friend being overly sensitive to everyday life events.
    Jess knew she’d revisit all of the same feelings she’d just gone through sooner rather than later though. An hour wasn’t enough to completely heal, but she knew she felt as okay as she did, because Kason was there with her.
    Jess had kissed Tabitha on the forehead, crying a bit again, feeling the coldness of her skin, and finally let Kason tug the sheet back up and over Tabitha’s face.
    “Come on, gorgeous, let’s get out of here.”
    Jess had nodded and they’d left. Kason thanked the caretaker and he’d taken them to the same park he’d pulled into not too long ago when he was taking her home from work that first night. He hadn’t said anything, but just helped her out of the car and they’d made the short walk to a bench. They’d sat on the bench and talked about Tabitha, and about nothing important for over two hours. Finally, after Jess’s stomach had growled, Kason had helped her up and taken her back to his car and back to his apartment.
    Now she was sitting on his couch, comfortable and warm, and trying not to cry. Jess felt like she’d been crying all day. She hated being such a wimp, she’d never been one to feel sorry for herself. She needed a distraction. She got up and made her way to the kitchen.
    “Can I help?”
    Benny looked up at Jessyka. She’d been strong all day and he was so proud of her. He wanted to make a good home-style meal for her. He’d never invited a woman to assist him in the kitchen before. It was his space, the place he went when he needed to decompress. But the thought of having Jess standing next to him helping him, felt right. It felt like the next natural step in their relationship . . . whatever that was.
    “I’d like nothing more than for you to help me, Jess.”
    Jessyka tilted her head, somehow knowing there was more to his words than she was understanding, but she wasn’t feeling up to figuring it out right now.
    “Where do you want me?”
    Benny chuckled, if Jess knew where he really wanted her, she’d probably run screaming from the apartment.
    “Come’ere. You chop the veggies while I put together the lasagna.”
    “You’re making lasagna? Isn’t that . . . complicated?”
    Benny leaned toward Jess and got in her space. “What? You don’t think I can do complicated?”
    Jess swallowed hard. There were times when she thought Kason wanted more from her than just friendship, like now, but then other times he acted just like a buddy, like a friend would. “I-I-I’m sure you can.” She hated how her voice stuttered.
    “I can do complicated, gorgeous. Promise. I like to cook. I’m good at it. This is gonna be the best lasagna you’ve ever eaten.”
    “If the omelet this morning was any