Free Letting Go by Molly McAdams Page A

knew he wouldn’t. The words “till death do us part” had been floating around my mind for the past week, but as they came up again, I was quick to push them back. That felt like a cop-out right now.
    “You all think if I were to move on, Jagger would be the guy I’d moved on to . . . but what if I don’t want Jagger?”
    Janie looked at me closely, and the same sad smile my mom had given me was now playing on her lips. “Now that I don’t believe.”
    Jagger
    June 27, 2014

    “ O H M Y G O D , Jagger?”
    My hand froze on the energy drink and my entire body tightened. Shit.
    “Is that you?”
    I swallowed thickly, and slowly pulled the can out of the refrigerated section before turning around to face her. She’d been calling me three times a week since graduation, and I hadn’t once answered. In a town the size of Thatch, I knew it would be impossible to avoid her forever, but I’d hoped.
    “Ah!” she squealed, and launched herself at me, wrapping her arms around my neck and her legs around my waist. I stumbled back against the glass door and automatically put my arms around her.
    “Hey, LeAnn,” I murmured as I disentangled myself from her.
    “How are you? God, you look great, Jagger!”
    I took a step to the side, trying to put more distance between us; she followed me. “Uh, thanks. So do you. How’ve you been?”
    “Oh, I’m doin’ just fine. I’ve been working at the salon in town for about a year now.”
    “Yeah, Charlie said she’s been going to you.”
    She laughed and grabbed at my forearm. “Right. God, I love that girl. Hey, have you been getting my messages? I’ve been calling you for a while now, hoping to get in touch with you ever since Charlie said you were about to move back from Pullman.” Her hand slowly glided up my arm, her nails lightly leading the trail. It was a touch that was so familiar, and one I didn’t want to feel.
    “Yeah, sorry about that. I’ve just been busy getting settled in and everything.” I moved my arm to cover my mouth as I cleared my throat and took another step back. The second my arm was down, she was touching me again.
    “Charlie was telling me all about how you turned the warehouse into a place to live in, and it sounded amazing—”
    “It—”
    “—and it turned out great, Jagger.”
    I went still and my face pinched together. “I’m sorry, what?”
    LeAnn shook her head in confusion, like she didn’t understand why I was pissed off suddenly. “The warehouse, it looks great.”
    “You’ve seen it?” I asked darkly, each word coming out slowly.
    “Yeah, I helped Charlie stock the place up on food for you!” she said on a laugh, like I should’ve known. And maybe if I’d actually listened to her messages, I might have.
    I bit back a curse and forced a tight-lipped smile. “Ah. Well, thanks for that. It was, uh, nice to not have to go to the store first thing.”
    “Of course, Jag, anything for you.”
    Oh God. Just as I was about to make an excuse to leave, she spoke again.
    “I always want to be able to take care of you.”
    Fucking hell. “Uh.” I rubbed the back of my neck with my free hand and laughed awkwardly. “LeAnn, uh, I appreciate it. But it’s . . . it’s been four years.”
    Her determined look didn’t falter as she closed the space between us. “Well, two if you count . . .” She trailed off.
    If you counted the week Ben and Grey got engaged, and the week I was trying to forget that the girl I wanted more than anything was days away from getting married. That had been the last time I’d been with anyone, and I literally would have been with any girl just as long as I could try to forget for a few hours every day what was coming in a short time.
    I looked away from her and tried to sound uninterested as I prayed to God there was someone in her life. “Still, that’s a long time, LeAnn, you can’t tell me you haven’t found someone else in that time.”
    The confident look I’d always seen on