Free Guilty as Sin by Tami Hoag Page A

lay curled on his side with his thumb in his mouth, asleep. Hannah lay behind him, his small body tucked back against hers, her arm around him. She looked like an angel who had tumbled to earth, tendrils of wavy golden hair escaping their band to fall against her cheek.
     
    The picture brought a bittersweet ache. He started to turn away from it, then Hannah opened her eyes and looked right at him. And he could no more walk away than he could stop his heart from beating.
     
    "I just wanted to check on you two before I left," he whispered, slipping into the room. "It looks like Josh is out cold."
     
    "The wonders of modern sedatives," Hannah murmured, raising herself on her elbow.
     
    "How are you doing?"
     
    "I've got Josh back. That's all that matters."
     
    "Paul didn't stay."
     
    Careful not to disturb Josh, she sat up and tucked her legs beneath her. "Josh didn't want him here. He acted as if ... as if he were afraid."
     
    The words had the bitter taste of blasphemy, as if she were somehow betraying Paul by speaking them, even though they were nothing less than the truth.
     
    "God, I hate Garrett Wright for what he's done to us," she admitted. "He did more than take our child. Whatever problems Paul and I had before all this, at least we trusted each other. When Josh reacted to him tonight, I looked at Paul like I'd never seen him before, like I actually believed he could have ... I don't," she whispered, even as the doubts scrolled through her mind—the lies about the van, the times he had been gone, his answering machine at the office picking up when he should have been there.
     
    Father Tom sat on the edge of the bed, reaching out to take her hand. She grabbed hold and hung on tighter than she meant to, wishing with all her heart he would put his arms around her and just hold her for a while. The longing that rose in her soul was for comfort and friendship and compassion. Things Tom McCoy would offer freely with no strings attached. He would never suspect her feelings had grown deeper; she would never tell him. She wouldn't risk losing what they had by asking for more than he could give her.
     
    "Don't add more guilt to the burden, Hannah," he said softly.
     
    She jerked her head up and looked at him, her pulse quickening at the absurd idea that he had somehow read her thoughts.
     
    "You can't control a reaction like that. Who knows why Josh reacted badly to his father? He's frightened and confused. We don't know what he's been through. We don't know what Wright might have planted in his mind. Josh responded and you reacted to that. You're allowed; you're his mother."
     
    "And Paul is his father. He would no more hurt Josh than he would—" Hurt me. Which he had done again and again; hurt her in ways that didn't leave obvious bruises or scars. "He wouldn't hurt Josh."
     
    "I'm sure he wouldn't."
     
    Tom raised his other hand and brushed a stray tear from beneath her eye. His fingertips threaded into the golden silk of her hair, and she turned her face to rest her cheek against the cool of his palm for just a moment. She held her breath, as if she could hold the moment within it.
     
    "Get some sleep," he whispered, fighting the urge to lean down and press a kiss to her forehead or her lips. Her hand was still in his. He gave it a squeeze. She answered it back. "We'll talk tomorrow."
     
    "Thanks for coming tonight. You've gone above and beyond the call through all of this."
     
    "No," he said. "You deserve a lot more than what you've been given." And he wished like hell he could have been the man to give it to her, but he couldn't be—or so he was told. And so he turned and walked away.
     
    And Hannah lay back down beside her child, listening to the rhythm of his breathing and wishing for things that could never be.
     
     
     
    CHAPTER 5
     
    There was no way of containing the news that Josh Kirkwood had been returned. The hospital staff told friends, who told other friends who worked nights and