Free Divine and Dateless by Tara West Page B

sleeping. Have a good night?” She flashed a flirty smile at Grim. “Your valet is a brutish brunette now, huh? So I assume the answer is yes.”
    “This isn’t my valet.” I thumbed at the man who was crushing my dreams. “This is the Grim Reaper who dropped me off yesterday. He’s taking me to Purgatory.”
    Grandma stepped back, and with an exaggerated movement, splayed a hand across her heart. “What?”
    I wasn’t buying the look of mock surprise in her eyes.
    I scowled even harder at him. “He says there was a clerical error.”
    “Look.” Grim groaned as he ran a hand through his hair. “You’re only one floor down. With good behavior, you’ll be back up here in ten, twenty years tops.”
    “Twenty years!” I gasped.
    “Good behavior!” Grandma snorted and then shook her head. “You obviously don’t know my granddaughter.”
    So much for her assertion last night that God didn’t make mistakes. She’d probably suspected I was sent to the wrong floor all along.
    “I’m sorry.” Grim’s lower lip turned a pout, making him look somewhat cute, though he was still an asshole. “My hands are tied. Boss’s orders.”
    I sank onto the bed as my world imploded. No more family, no more beautiful apartment, and no more hot sex. I sure hoped they sold batteries in Purgatory, because I was going to need an awful lot to get me through twenty years of misery. Unable to stop the well of tears from overflowing, I buried my face in my hands and sobbed.
    “Don’t cry, sweetheart.” Grandma sat beside me, wrapping a slender arm around my shoulder. “Grandpa’s just a few floors down. I’ll see you every weekend when I pay him conjugal visits.”
    Great. Even Grandma was on Grim’s side. The finality of my fate made me sob even harder.
    Grandma patted my back as if she was trying to burp a baby. “There, there. Everything will be okay. I’ll bring cheesecake.”

My digs on floor thirteen looked suspiciously similar to my crappy apartment on Earth.
    I spun a slow circle, surveying my surroundings: compact kitchen with an ancient, baby puke-green fridge, a two-burner stove, and chipped floor tiles. To the side was a small dinette with mismatched chairs, and rounding out the circle was a cramped living room with stained shag carpet, a secondhand sofa, and an old, clunky television.
    I eyed Grim through slitted lids. “I thought you said I wasn’t going to be on level two.”
    “This was the best I could do, Ash.” He shrugged and flashed an apologetic smile.
    What happened to Mr. Jerkface from last night? I was beginning to suspect this guy had a split personality or else he was another illusion.
    “Ashley,” I said in a huff as I turned up my nose.
    “I’ve got to get back to work.” He spoke through a sigh as he dug a card out of his pocket. “Here. You’ve got an appointment in two hours with your creditor.”
    “My creditor?”
    I eyed the little white business card. It was crinkled and musty, as if it had spent the night in Grim’s pocket. The name on the card was smudged, but the street address and suite number were still readable, and the 12:00 p.m. appointment time was clearly written in blue ink.
    “Your creditor tracks your credits,” Grim explained. “He also gives you advice on how to earn more credits, so you can move up to the next floor.”
    I recalled earlier that morning when Grim told me someone had miscalculated my credits. I clenched my hands as heat filled my body and infused my skull. My head felt like a steaming kettle ready to explode. “Is he the one who screwed up my credits and sent me to Heaven?” I said through gritted teeth.
    Grim gave a succinct nod.
    “Great,” I spat. “I’ve got a few choice words for him.”
    Grim wagged a finger. “Choose your words with caution, Ash. You need to maintain a good relationship with your creditor if you want to shoot up faster.”
    I was about to tell Mr. Jerkface to stop calling me by my nickname when I was startled