Free Play on by Kyra Lennon Page B

to do, right?” I nodded. “He even picked my favourite. Said I could choose a movie for us to watch, and we’d spend the evening curled up together. Instead of saying ‘thank you’ like a normal person, I flipped out about how fat I already I am, and asked why he would bring me food that would make me fatter. I mean, really? How ungrateful can I be?” She sighed. “It’s just… at the time, everything I said seemed reasonable to me. Like he was trying to purposely make me look disgusting so he has an excuse to leave me.”
    Wow. This wasn’t Leah. She had always been confident, feisty, and wouldn’t take any crap. Pregnancy hormones – based on what a couple of other people I knew had experienced – had the power to drag up deep-buried concerns and bring them to the forefront. I’ve no idea if there’s any true science behind it, it was just something I’d spotted. When Leah first got pregnant, she was happy and scared. Scared because she and Radleigh had only been together officially for around four months when they found out. Nothing between them had ever been simple, and adding a baby to the mix so soon had forced their relationship farther forward than they’d expected. Whatever Leah was throwing at Radleigh, I was sure, were her un-voiced concerns that he wasn’t ready to settle down.
    “Leah, come on.” I wrapped my arm around her shoulders. “I think you’re confusing him with the old Radleigh.”
    “Since when did you become his biggest fan?” she mumbled, and I laughed.
    “Since he made my best friend happier than I’ve ever seen her.” Leah lifted her head, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. Her misery caused an unpleasant twinge inside me and I held her tighter. “Honey, Radleigh is… Radleigh. He’s always going to have that quick temper, and he’s always going to say and do things that make you crazy. He’s also always going to have a past, and knowing what his was like, I can understand why you’d worry. But ask anyone and they’ll tell you the same thing. He’s with you. He loves you, and that’s obvious to everyone.”
    “For now. What about when we’re up to our eyeballs in nappies, and the baby’s screaming all night long?”
    “You’re both equally responsible for creating your baby, Leah. You make it sound like he’ll resent you for it.”
    “Maybe he will.”
    “Maybe you’ll resent him.”
    Her brow furrowed. “Why would I? Fast as it is, this is everything I want.”
    I had to refrain from rolling my eyes good-naturedly at her. “It’s everything he wants, too.”
    “I know. Logically, I know that. But I can’t stop myself snapping at him, and I can’t stop thinking the worst. I don’t know what to do.”
    “Sure you do. You have to talk to him.”
    And there it was again. That awful stabbing sensation that resembled jealousy when I spent too long with people who actually had a significant other to tell their problems too. I didn’t begrudge them happiness; far from it. I kind of wanted to shake Leah’s shoulders and tell her to hold on to Radleigh as tight as possible because nobody ever knows when it could all be snatched away.
    That’s the thing about life, I suppose. Everyone has their own stuff going on, their own perspectives. Mine had altered so radically since Will died it was no surprise I barely recognised myself. I’d never taken what I had for granted. Never. But if I’d known what was around the corner, maybe I’d have done things differently.
    But how?
    Would I have told Will I loved him sooner? Or would I have continued to shy away from our relationship to avoid getting hurt?
    Nope. I’d have been hurt either way, because no matter what, I’d still have been in love with him, and having him for a short time was better than never having the chance to know how it felt to hold him, to kiss him, to make love to him.
    Leah’s hand covered mine, bringing me back to reality, and as I looked at her I knew she knew what I was