Free Love and Hate by Chelsea Ballinger Page A

ready to attend high
school hell?” Dina says as she looks around at everyone who is still gawking at
us like a bunch of sheep.  
    “Ready as I’ll ever be.”  I sigh
out an answer.
    “You sure you don’t want me to
show you to your first class?” Ella asks.
    “No, I’m cool. I’ll see you
later.”
    I start walking inside the school
and I notice it’s very big. It’s probably bigger than my school back in Manhattan.
But the good thing about this place is that we don’t have to wear any uniforms.
    No one is staring at me now. It’s
probably because I’m not with Ella which is why I didn’t want her to show me
around. I just don’t like the staring because it’s annoying and it makes me
want to punch people in the face. Besides, I’m trying to keep my anger in
check.
    But in all honesty my anger has
surprisingly gone down. Ever since that night I have felt nothing. I don’t even
know how to explain it. It’s not anger, sadness, or depression. It’s pain. It’s
a numbness of pain. A pain that I have become so tolerable of that it’s a part
of me. Therefore, it’s nothing to me anymore.
    “Yo! D!” I turn around to see
familiar faces. It’s Emile and Jason.   They run through the crowd, towards me.
    “Man it’s been awhile.” Emile says.
    I shake up with the guys and
actually hug them. I missed Emile’s midget ass and scrawny cousin of mine,
Jason.
    “I know. It’s good to see you
guys.”
    “How you been doing?” Jason asks.
    “I’m cool; I’m just trying to get
use to things, you know?”
                            “You
look different.” Emile says.
    “That’s what everybody says.
Listen, I have to go to class.”
    “Nobody goes to first period
early.” Jason says.
    “Yeah, but I promised my mom I
would start the semester right.”
    “Alright man, find us if you need
anything.” Emile says.
     
    I start back on my journey to
find my classroom. After passing three more rooms, I finally get to room 130.
Here we go.
    I walk right in to see only three
people in class. Thank God. I don’t want to be the center of attention.
    I glance at the clock over the
white erase board and see there’s three minutes left until class starts. I see
a girl with glasses sitting up straight in the front row with a line of four
pencils on her desk. You can tell she’s ready to learn. I eye the desk at the
very back. I walk over towards it and sit down.
    I’m sitting between two people
already. The guy on my left smells straight like weed; I wish I smoked
something to mellow out my nerves. This girl on my left seems to feel like me,
tired. She has her head on the desk with her arms folded, covering up her face.
She has pretty hair. It’s the first thing I notice. Even a guy can tell when a
girl puts too many product in her hair. It looks hard and gross. But this girl,
her hair is long and looks soft and flowing. I guess that’s the word I’m
looking for. It brings the creep out in me and makes me want to touch it.  I
can smell her perfume too. Its smells like, well something I don’t know, but
it’s nice.
    Kids are starting to walk in now
along with the teacher. He looks scruffy and tired. His eyes are blood shot. Wow,
he looks crazy. He has on a brown corduroy jacket and a green bow tie. He looks
like a dork, a complete weirdo.
    I feel the girl next to me sit up
while I continue watching our teacher fumble with his papers. He barely can
stand from what I’m seeing. Is he drunk?
     I hear the girl next to me yawn.
Its kind a cute if that is even possible… How does a yawn sound cute?    
    “God, I hate this place.” I hear
her quietly say, but loud enough for me to hear.
     I laugh to myself and turn
around wondering what she looks like.
    Holy shit.
     
     

 
     
     
     
     
     
     
                                                       Chapter
    4
    “The Hazards of Fate”
    Claudia
    You ever get the feeling